Dinosaur Dracula!

The Mostly-Complete Dino Drac Archives.

You have some reading to do!

Below are most of the blog archives. Certain categories may be excluded to keep things tidier. There’s even more junk on the Features Page, too!

April 2016 Update:  I’m currently (read: finally) working on the archives to make ’em a bit more navigable. You shouldn’t have much trouble now, but check back soon for prettier pages to jump between. 🙂

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    Opening a can of TMNT Pasta from 1991.

    I don’t know why I’m even bothering with an intro. You’re just gonna skip ahead to the rotten pasta. Hey, I don’t blame you. I’d do the same. Behold, a sealed can of Chef Boyardee’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Pasta, from 1991. Well, a formerly sealed can… DUH NUH NUH NUH NU

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    Purple Stuff: All About 1988!

    There was a whole lot to love about 1988! Even more than just Oatmeal Swirlers. From Nintendo Cereal to Child’s Play, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit are covering 1988’s greatest hits in the latest Purple Stuff Podcast. We dug pretty deep on this one, as evidenced by the whol

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    Videos of my Bedroom, from 1992.

    When I think about my place in the world during the early ‘90s — let’s say from the 5th through the 9th grade — I’m revolted but appreciative. Revolted, because those were tough, lonely years, when I was as goofy and awkward as I’ll hopefully ever be. Too alien to mesh

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    Dino Drac’s July 2016 Funpack!

    It’s hard to believe, but with the arrival of Dino Drac’s July Funpack, I’ve now been doing these for a full two years. WOW. I never expected that this would go on for so long, and I can’t thank all of my subscribers enough. You’ve kept Dino Drac afloat for far longer than its pr

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    Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 11!

    Welcome to the latest edition of Five Retro TV Commercials, starring me, my cat and a broken Mer-Man character bust. Us three. Sunkist Fun Fruits! (1980s) I was partial to Fruit Wrinkles, but there’s no denying that Sunkist’s Fun Fruits were THE fruit snacks of the ‘80s. Originally s

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    Ratty 1980s Plush Dolls.

    My collection of oddities includes many ratty dolls from the 1980s. Only a few are kept on permanent display; the rest live in bins and bags, too cute to throw away, but too filthy to waste shelves on. The five featured below have been trapped out of sight for years, to the point where I

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    Spider-Man loves Kool-Aid Man.

    My obsession with old Kool-Aid packets takes me to strange places. Like the back pages of Spider-Man comics from the late ‘90s. Thanks to a hot tip on Twitter (love you, Aaron and Skinslip), I learned that the July 1996 issue of The Amazing Spider-Man was hiding something awesome inside

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    Five Random Action Figures, Part 29!

    Welcome to the 29th (!!!) edition of Five Random Action Figures, posted during the busiest holiday weekend of the year. If you’re reading this between now and July 5th, congratulations, you are one of the lucky dozen to do so. Below: Five more action figures from the ‘80s and ‘90s. H

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    Newspaper Ads from 1993!

    I get the strangest care packages! My good pal Jerrod K. accurately predicted that I’d be so into this. A pile of Sunday newspaper ads from July 11th, 1993! They were all in gem mint condition, and though I suppose I could just ask, it’s more fun to simply wonder why he had a newspaper

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    Stay Puft Marshmallow Twinkies!

    Even with its 80 trailers and 500 TV spots, excitement for the Ghostbusters reboot is being fueled as much by junk food. From Ecto Cooler to misshapen marshmallows to Key Lime Slime Twinkies, I can only hope that I have half as much fun watching the movie as I’ve had eating it. …an

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    More Ancient Cereal Boxes!

    While tidying up my office, I came across a stash of old cereal boxes, sandwiched between far less interesting things. Below are five of them. (This is what we in the biz call a utilitarian intro.) Spider-Man Cereal! (1995) At least partially inspired by the 1994 cartoon, Ralston’s Spide

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    Summer Memories from the ’80s and ’90s!

    Summer is here! Sure, it’s only my third favorite season, and sure, it comes in dead last if we’re only talking about the weather, but still… yay! It’s a season full of roller coasters and yard sales and cotton candy and tiki mugs, so no matter how humid, sticky and bug-filled the

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    Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 10!

    Welcome to the tenth edition of Five Retro TV Commercials. Since I’m just now noticing that milestone, I can’t say that I have anything special planned. Just more old commercials. Crest Toothpaste! (1980s) As crazy as this one is, every kid-targeted toothpaste commercial was just as bo

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    New Ghostbusters Slime Toys!

    I’m all-in on the new Ghostbusters toys, yo. It’s the first line in many years that’s compelled me to spend money recklessly. I’d never go so far to say that Mattel outdid Kenner’s Real Ghostbusters collection, but I think they’re paying it serious homage. On that note, I’ve

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    Dino Drac’s June 2016 Funpack!

    Running Dino Drac takes lots of time, money and blood sacrifices, so if you enjoy what I do here, the best way to keep it going is by subscribing to Dino Drac’s Funpacks. June’s looking like a good month to start! ($25 MONTHLY SUBSCRIPTION BOX. UNITED STATES ONLY.) The quick-and-dirty:

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    Junk Food of the Gods, Part 5!

    It’s been four months since the last edition of Junk Food of the Gods, which means that I’ve missed the chance to immortalize so many limited edition snacks. I’m genuinely angry about this. I want to scream. All I can do is pick up where I left off. Down below: More junk food. Extra

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    Purple Stuff: All About 1990!

    1990 was a big year. A huge year! From Gremlins 2 to Dick Tracy, I’m not sure that any other year provided me with so many obsessions. Also, since I’d started junior high by the time 1990 ended, it was really my last chance to be a kid in the truest sense, free to wallow

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    Five Random Action Figures, Part 28!

    Dino Drac turned four this week. Can’t believe how fast the time went! I started the site thinking it would either be my second chance or my flat-noted swan song, and I’m proud to say that Dino Drac lasting for four years points to the former. Hope you’ll stick around for another fou

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    Purple Stuff: The Ecto Cooler Adventure.

    The holiday weekend was an unending fiasco. Memorial Day marked the official return of Hi-C Ecto Cooler, and even though I’d already scored a few press samples, I needed to experience it the real way. I needed the personal shopping experience. (Also, I just wanted more goddamned Ecto Coo

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    Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 9!

    Just like last time, everything in this edition of Five Retro TV Commercials comes from that tape full of 1991 Ninja Turtles cartoons. (I’ll be putting that cassette to rest after this article, by the way. There are other commercials on it, but nothing you can’t live without seeing aga