With another assist from Larry P., here’s the next batch of Classic Creepy Commercials! (You’ve read Volume 1, right?)
Exactly zero of these have any clear link to the Halloween season, and yet, all of them are undeniably Halloweeny. If you’re in need of a late October spirit boost, these should fix you right up.
Aurora “Ghost Racer” Commercial! (1987)
The appeal of Aurora’s Ghost Racer set lied in not needing a friend to race against you. Though the set had everything you needed for a two-player race, you could also opt to go it alone, squaring off against a deadly black car driven by NOBODY.
It wasn’t the only set with that gimmick, but no one else packaged it so magnificently. The idea that your “computer” opponent was a spectral entity? That’s awesome.
No matter how good the toy was, the commercial made it seem so much better. Between the spooky music, the liberal use of fog, and the interpretation of Ghost Racer as a semi-translucent sneaky bastard with his sights set on imaginary trophies, the ad turned even the most disinterested kids into outright gearheads. Read More…
Madd Matt sure spent a long time making this video!
Never heard of Spider Bites? Made by Topps in 1990, it was a collection of ghoulish spider figurines that dispensed awful, colorful candy.
They came in a really great box!
I’m back with another edition of “hey here are some videos sitting around the house that are tangentially related to Halloween.”
#11: Halloween III: The Season of the Witch (1982)
Watch the trailer!
Halloween III spent most of its life as the franchise’s laughingstock. Slowly but surely, fans have warmed up to it. In truth, it was never a bad movie (don’t confuse “ridiculous” with “bad”), and much of its negative reputation stemmed from its earliest audiences – people who just couldn’t accept a Halloween movie without Michael Myers.
Many of us adopted the same opinion because that’s all we’d ever read, and it took me several viewings to realize that the movie had merit. A LOT of merit, actually.
It’s hard to put its story in a nutshell, but I’ll try: Some crazy novelty kingpin sells thousands of Halloween masks, which are supernaturally rigged to turn their wearers’ heads into big heaping piles of bugs and snakes. I don’t know how anyone could read that and not want to see this film. I haven’t researched, but it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that the story was conceived in the ‘70s, because it fits right in with that decade’s lean on “global damnation” in horror movies.
The film was a failed attempt to turn the Halloween franchise into a series of disconnected films tied only by title, or so the legend goes. Had it been successful, it’s possible that Michael Myers would’ve never returned. In that way, we can be glad it tanked – but we should be thankful that we got such a wonderfully screwy movie in the process. See it! Read More…
The Vintage Vending series returns with an incredibly seasonal addition. From 1994, get a load of the HALLOWEEN HORRORS collection!
We’ve seen better prizes in the past, but on card art alone, this may be my favorite entry yet. I’ve seen plenty of vending assortments with “horror” flavors, but it’s exceedingly rare to find one that’s so undeniably tied to the Halloween season.
The design is complete perfection, looking more like signage from some ancient cheesy dark ride than something you’d find near a supermarket’s exit. Art like this can stop traffic, which is hilarious, because just imagine all of the stupid people crashing shopping carts into total strangers’ asses.
“Halloween Horrors” is a great title, yes, but please take note of the fine print:
“Plus Other Fine Toys.”
Translation: This was stuffed with the junky leftovers from a hundred other vending machines. Hell, once you get past the obvious chasers, even the shown sample prizes are utter garbage.
But what would’ve been an annoying experience in 1994 is easier to appreciate in 2013. What better topper for a “Halloween” vending machine than the knowledge that most players ended up with tiny plastic magnifying glasses? Since I can’t play, I take vindictive solace in knowing that Halloween Horrors caused so much disappointment. Yeah, I’m that guy. Read More…