My friend “D” mailed me a spooky care package, and among its incredible contents was one of RoseArt’s Halloween Color Blanks. The one that looks like a pumpkin.
My first thought? “Pretty cool.” My second thought? To run out and buy the remaining two Halloween Color Blanks. And my third thought had something to do with grasshoppers.
They arrive as featureless albinos. The Color Blanks, I mean. Not the grasshoppers.
Actually, if you count the eggs, grasshoppers do, too.
It’s up to us to turn them into artful creatures with real pumping hearts, and I really do mean the Color Blanks this time. This isn’t my first go at coloring a Color Blank, but it is my first go at a Color Blank with a pumpkin for a head.
They’re on sale at Target, and I assume, other stores. Though my Color Blank fever was running too high to be bothered to check, I’m pretty sure they were five bucks each. I admit that there’s a small cynic living inside me, and this cynic believes they cost closer to $7.
Each figure comes with three markers and a sticker sheet. In theory, you don’t have to limit yourself to these materials. If you’re really motivated, you can use all sorts of things to bring your monsters to life. Other markers, plastic sequins, you name it. I was not “really motivated,” but even the few materials RoseArt provided were enough to turn these pale bitches into the Vegas strip.
Coloring a Color Blank isn’t hard, per se, but it’s definitely time consuming. The shapes of the figures make it a long process, and I had to completely toss my “ten minute rule” out the window.
Not that I’m complaining. Every minute spent making white Color Blanks green was another minute spent sniffing those glorious markers. They have an unbelievably great odor. The weird thing is, I don’t think they’ve been purposely scented, or at least, not purposely scented to smell like fruit. BUT THEY DO.
I can’t place the exact fruit, but I guess it’s a cross between grapes and raspberries? Ma Grape and Pa Raspberry battle many social stigmas, but nobody can deny that their children smell fucking terrific.
Below are my monsters, and don’t bother judging them. I’ve already given myself three A pluses. You can’t try a man twice. It’s double jeopardy.
This guy started off as a friendly pumpkin monster, but after I added the stickers to his face, he seemed a bit more evil. At least, as evil as a guy wearing lime green pajamas can seem.
The marker they provide for pumpkin flesh is more salmon than orange. It’s too odd of a switch for there not to have been some reasoning behind it. Maybe orange ink doesn’t take to the figures that well? I won’t feel completely deserving of that A+ until I figure out why RoseArt insisted on salmon colored pumpkin heads.
Note the little “pumpkin badge” sticker. When you’re a pumpkin with legs and one human eye, you kind of need to clarify that you’re really a pumpkin. Hence, the badge. You can’t wear it if you’re not one.
RoseArt obviously wants us to color this one like Frankenstein’s Monster, but after playing it so by-the-book with the pumpkin, I felt I needed to be more creative.
So, I turned him into some kind of Cenobite. Not quite Pinhead, but one of the guys who stands behind Pinhead, punctuating his threats with “mmm hmm you know it” nods.
For a moment, he really looked the part. Eventually, I surrendered to stupidity and put two “shirt button” stickers over his eyes. When I was through, he looked more like a confused race car driver than a Cenobite.
By the third Color Blank, I was fried. Mentally exhausted and ready to watch TV. Fortunately, the last one was ghost-shaped, so I could get away with leaving most of him uncolored.
I’m having a hard time deciding who he is. I certainly wasn’t thinking about that while creating him. He came about bit by bit, between rounds of some terrible Bingo game on Facebook.
Boy, did that piss him off. As revenge for my divided attention, the ghost shouted “B13” – a number that had never been called — and intentionally sunk my game. Because of him, “LucyB” took third prize and won my rightful bonus power-ups. Even now, things between us are…not great.
A very wrinkled white sheet does little to hide the green ghoul beneath it. With a fashion sense best described as “ragtag chic,” he’s easily the most interesting looking of the trio. Funny, since by this point, I wasn’t trying at all. There’s a lesson to be learned here, I think.
If you spot them, buy them. Or at least one of ‘em. RoseArt’s Halloween Color Blanks are fun to make, look great on display, and come with markers that will keep you residually high for at least two hours. Not bad for five bucks. Or seven bucks. I can’t remember.
Raspgrapes. That’s what they should call them.