Vlog: The Simpsons Easter Basket!

Easter is tomorrow. May those who celebrate spend tonight dyeing eggs and fiddling with phony grass.

I went to our city’s last remaining K-Mart yesterday. The place was a wreck. Looked like it hadn’t been remodeled since 1982. Still had an “Eatery” and everything. Smelled like bad milk.

They must have had over a hundred different prepackaged Easter baskets. You know, the ones with the generic superheroes, and plastic dinosaurs that look more like tigers. 95% of them were hilariously terrible, which is exactly what I wanted to see.

I did find one lone Simpsons basket hiding in the mix, though. Here’s a video detailing its contents!

Who wouldn’t love a bouncy Bart Simpson ball and two and a half Lemonheads?

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40 Responses to Vlog: The Simpsons Easter Basket!


  2. Oh man, this video is amazing! Your “yule log” moment and description of the Fun-Dip seriously made my day. :D
    Thanks for that, Matt.
    Happy Easter to you and Ms. X.

  3. So…that cameo at the end was absolutely terrifying. Thanks, Matt!

  4. The Easter Laviathon

    (that’s probably not spelled right)

  5. I would’ve expected way more candy than that for $16.

  6. I don’t know about anyone else, but for me Easter is about chocolate(candy to an extent). As much as child IHAQ loved The Simpsons, I would have been really disappointed if this was my Easter basket. Seriously lacking in sugar!

  7. This basket seems to have depressed the hell out of you.

  8. I have never been a big fan of Easter, but wow, this video was amazing. One of my favorites ever. Best part was the description of the rules of basketball and then the super mega crazy extreme punch. Thanks so much for making a Saturday afternoon while I am stuck at work that much better!

  9. That made my day so much better *happy dance* and I agree with Robert, I would have thought there would be a mountain of candy in that thing.
    I found at target yesterday a giant two pound chocolate Easter bunny and it took all my will power not to buy it.

  10. Well this is the best GD video of the year so far. So so good. The dry wit makes this perfection. Thanks for the Easter present!

  11. Oh, I’ve wasted my life!

  12. Nicely done, best video of the year so far. The timing on the ball punch was great, as was the surprise guest star.

    Of course, if it’s just learning magic now, I’m not scared at what might be coming. A small grouping of boils? Croak like a frog for an hour? I don’t think a portal to the elder gods is going to open under my bed with that level of magic!

  13. Viewing DD on a computer on the sales floor at IKEA! That’s a first. Also means I can’t watch the video (yet). I shall tonight, though! Man, that K-Mart still had an eatery? Growing up, down a big hill by my house was a shopping plaza and it was the first place I felt comfortable enough to travel to by myself via bike. I’d sit all alone in their eatery and eat a fried shrimp and fries basket. Felt so grown up. Then the walled off the eatery. Drove me nuts! As a grown up I’d walk by and knock on that wall and would have killed to seen the other side again. So many people shopped there and had no idea what was behind a plain white wall. I can still almost smell the stale Mr. Pibb.

  14. To me, Halloween is the chocolate holiday. For me, Easter is all about the jellybeans. There are so many different varieties out thee. A couple of years ago, I spent almost 50 bucks just to try a whole lot a brands/varieties. Around the store, I’m known as the jellybean guy because of that.

  15. My local flea market has a stand selling football team themed baskets. Being a Ravens fan in the middle of Patriots country it’s very difficult to find any other team’s merchandise much less Baltimore. The baskets range from $30-$40 depending on the team but all pretty much have the same items: Lanyard, mini Nerf football, mini basketball and hoop, team gnome, car air freshener, can caddy, plastic cup and insulated cooler bag.

    Ahhhh…the joy of the K mart cafeteria. Those of us who ate there will never forget.

  16. I am now craving K-Mart eatery food. Maybe I’ll have Easter dinner there.

  17. Love it Matt! Great video- love the bunny cameo and yule log. And I want a Bart Simpson hat to wear everyday, but mostly to the Exxon Mobil Tiger Market (where I do most of my shopping). Also loved the Charlie Brown Encyclopedia post yesterday!

  18. I love this. I love Easter. I couldn’t care less about the religious aspects but there are a few musts:
    - The Ten Commandments. I have seen it every year I can remember. Reminds me of my Dad.
    - It’s the Easter Beagle Charlie Brown, ’nuff said
    - Coloring Easter Eggs. Must be at least one that was in every color to become dark brown.
    - Mallrats. Kevin Smith’s classic counts as an Easter movie to me due to the Easter Bunny scene.

  19. Fantastic video. Loved the reappearance of Leviathan and the crinkling cellophane moment.

  20. Ahhh, the joys of K-Mart. Until they finally put up a WalMart in 2006, if you wanted to buy anything in Cape May County that wasn’t made out of shells or beach quartz, you went to the K-Mart in Rio Grande. K-Mart is still there, but it’s no longer the K-Mart of my childhood, where you could get everything from a frilly dress to a hot dog and a soda if you begged your mom right. I know the Eatery was there as late as 2005 – I used to get an occasional sandwich when I’d be shopping. I think it’s gone now, though.

    I also have very fond memories of Fun Dip. They were THE choice candy at my sisters’ softball games. Not only were they fairly cheap, but you got both the candy and the sugar powder – two treats for the price of one. I’m surprised I wasn’t bouncing off the bleachers, given how much of it I consumed then.

    The grocery store where I work sells pre-packaged Easter baskets, but they aren’t even as nifty (or as themed) as that one.

    And speaking of…Happy Easter (and Passover, too) to Matt and all Dinosaur Dracula regulars! I hope you guys have a great day tomorrow.

  21. At what point did the Simpsons get to be so jock oriented? Oh right, never.

  22. Fun Dip = Stick > Dip. Those sticks are my favorite candy. I wish they sold just those.

  23. Love how on the tag for the basket the TOTAL NET WT. is featured as, if not more, prominently as The Simpsons name.

    Oh, and an article on that time capsule K-Mart would be great! Haven’t been in a K-Mart eatery for like 20 years. Been 25+ since I was in a Woolworth’s food place-ery…

  24. @ScottP: I actually tried to get the photos for an article, but it’s pretty impossible. The big sights are in places where there’s no good way to take pics. (Eatery/Nathan’s at the front, the registers obviously surrounded by people, etc. I’ll try again someday, though. I fear it isn’t long for the world.)

  25. Are kids still into the Simpsons? Love the video! Shades of a Madd Matt video coming through with the coughing and the cameo by Leviathan.

    My wife seems to be trying to turn Easter into Christmas Part 2 by getting our kids and the kids in the family way too many toys and not little crap toys I mean like full Lego sets, video games, dolls, etc. I’m okay with spoiling the kids for Christmas but Easter seems excessive. As a kid I remember getting an basket with chocolate, jelly beans, maybe Peeps and a bendy rabbit and that’s IT. Maybe I’m just jealous…oh well Happy Easter all! :)

  26. John V it’s become a second Christmas almost…mainy because of the whole obesity epidemic, and retailers are trying to make up for holiday losses.

    Also there is a chocolate shortage apparently

    Best or one of the best Easter baskets I ever got, I won at Seaside Heights boardwalk. That place went all out in the 80′s with attendants dressed like farmers…petting zoo’s bunnies…I won a basket with um…a foam max headroom puppet…a dinosaur coloring book, candy and a plush something or other and also a chocolate bunny.

    Second best is my grandma I guess felt the need to put everyone in sugar coma and we got like a crap ton of cadbury eggs, and about 3 different flavor gigantic eggs(palmer made them I believe) they had like that hard crunchy flower on top…filed with peanut butter, coconut cream, fudge…and gertrude hawk chocolate is awesome!

    One time my family took a tour of the old monmouth easter candy factory in Freehold. I was like 8…I thought we were going to see like the second coming of Willy Wonka, with rabbits making candy….it was just a lousy old factory with old ladies making chocolate on an assembly line…like I love Lucy where her and Ethel made candy.

  27. OMG Leviathan!!!! thank you for making my easter! wooooo!

  28. My favorite Easter memory was from when I was 5 and my parents were driving to my Grandma’s house in Iowa. I played with my little rubber bendy Easter bunny the whole way and when we got there I saw my great Grandpa and he was holding a bunny on the front porch! I ran up and saw the rabbit blinking and twitching his little nose. Then I realized my Grandpa was holding him by the spine while carving the meat off him into a bucket at his feet… Easter’s never been the same for me since…

  29. I wish we could have seen video of the other terrible baskets and this rank old K-Mart… That in itself would have been very entertaining.

    All in all, I now covet your prize. Be warned…

  30. We still have a few KMarts in town that were suppose to go out of business years ago but never did. The one KMart eatery we had was walled off in the back of the store by yellow/brown stained glass and wood walls. It was my uncles favorite place to eat haha. They still had an eatery type area in another local KMart but it was phased out a couple years ago. Great video. Would have also like to see the other cheap baskets but buying cheap Easter baskets just for videos probably isn’t the best financial decision.

  31. My favorite part of this video was from 0:00 to 6:19. Your description of the Fun Dip flavor made my day.

    Easter has never been one of my favorite holidays. My mom would always make me wear frilly dresses and a hat. Also egg hunting isn’t fun if you’re in competition with toddlers.

  32. Eric M, that is horrifying. That sounds like the kind of story Kate would tell Billy to explain why she hates Easter.

    Matt, you know I’ve been reading your stuff and watching your videos for a long time. Well, this was one of, if not THE best video you’ve ever done. So funny! Everything about it from the awkward pauses to the basketball rules to the punch to Leviathan…it was all great. Well done, sir.

    I’ve always thought those store bought, pre-packaged Easter baskets were cheap and crappy. My mom put together the best Easter baskets for me…she still does, actually. That’s right, I’m just a little bit spoiled.

    Happy Easter, everybody!

  33. Excellent video. I loved the return of the Madd Matt cough and of course Leviathan.
    We still have a few K-Marts left around Indy and as far as I know they all still have eateries. They were originally in the back of the store,but moved to the front sometime in the late 90′s. That’s also when they started selling Little Ceasar’ s Pizza. For a long time that was the only place you could buy your pizza pizza.
    Is that some art on the wall you could feature in the future? I think so.
    Keep the videos coming! They make me happy.

  34. Hey everyone. Checking in on Easter afternoon to say “Happy Easter Afternoon.” I introduced my niece to the concept of “malted milk” candy and supplied my nephew with many Peeps. My work is finished.

    When I was a kid, my father would hide my Easter basket. Best place ever: inside the flush box of the toilet. I never found it, even after the ‘hot/cold’ game led me right into the bathroom. (Don’t worry, it was sealed in two garbage bags.)

    The K-Mart Cafeteria. Oh, the memories.

  35. The Leviathan cameo was better than anything in the basket! Sure it may all have been officially licensed, but it was not worth what they were charging. Great video Matt, and Happy Easter all!

  36. The nearest Kmart to me with an eatery is in Randolph, NJ on Rt. 10. It still has a Little Caesars in the front corner, with additional Kmart items, including ICEEs, popcorn, Nathan’s Hot Dogs, pretzels, and nachos. It, like many others in the NYC area, was paired with a Pathmark, which has since closed (there’s an A&P down the road) and has been turned into an LA Fitness. Also: Kmart is no longer hyphenated.

  37. I forgot to mention something which may provide you with the hours of entertainment it provided me: if you plug your nose and chew a jelly bean, you will not be able to tell what flavor it is. Unplug your nose and WHAMMO the flavor hits you like a ton of bricks.

  38. I had a Fisher Price tape recorder that came with a tape with a bunch of sound effect ideas. One of them was to use cellophane to make the sound of fire.

    Good call, Matt.

  39. Another hilarious video. At least you didn’t get the Krusty brand alarm clock that just sprays acid in your face

  40. So effing funny.

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