Put simply, a yard haunt refers to the assemblage of Halloween decorations on one’s front lawn. Media attention focuses on those who go all-out, with thousands of dollars’ worth of spooky scenery. In truth, you could put two plastic skulls on your stoop and call it a “yard haunt.” That’s the beauty of it!

Yard haunts are quietly one of the best things about this season. Who hasn’t driven around their neighborhood on some October evening, marveling at everyone’s macabre creations? It’s Halloween in its purest form.

I’m impressed when a family takes their decorating to theme park levels, but I’m even more charmed by the “simpler” yard haunts, which utilize found or homemade items, and nail a certain “crude charm” better than anything else on the goddamned planet.

You should know the type, because so many of us grew up making them. Between the slapdash scarecrows and the cardboard tombstones, they were testaments to our creativity… and to our general unwillingness to spend more than a half hour doing anything.

Those sorts of yard haunts looked — and still look — something like this:

Granted, that’s staged from my back deck, but had I assembled it on the front lawn, it’d look no different. My spread includes all of the major yard haunt bullet points, and best of all, I couldn’t have spent more than five bucks on it.

Mileages vary, but as I see it, the classic, screwy, cheapo yard haunt primarily consists of five items. If you’d like to make your own, start with this junk: Read More…

If you’re charmed by the idea of “Halloween cereal” but find the usual crop a bit too juvenile for your tastes, here’s one for the more sophisticated palate:

Okay, so maybe I’m stretching things. Just a little.

Still, Kellogg’s new Pumpkin Spice Frosted Mini-Wheats is by far one the least “cartoony” of this year’s autumnal breakfast offerings, and if you don’t believe me, just check out that box. It looks like a Food & Wine cover!

(Huge props to the designer on this one. It’s the most fall-centric thing I’ve seen all year, evoking everything from farmer’s markets to late October picnics. Thank you, cereal box, for inspiring me to learn more about flour and foliage.) Read More…

Apparently, my new thing is posting ten seconds before midnight. I’ve decided to roll with it!

It’s time for the latest episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast, with me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit. In tonight’s show, we’re talking about all sorts of PUMPKIN MONSTERS from all walks of pop culture. Basically, any character that can be perceived — however loosely — to be part pumpkin.

From Sam of Trick ‘r Treat fame to Blobkin the Halloween Boglin, I think we hit all of the major ones. Know of any more? Tell us in the comments… or just discuss the weird creatures mentioned in this episode!

You can listen on the player above, or access the MP3 directly over here. As a reminder, The Purple Stuff Podcast is also on iTunes and Stitcher!

Thanks so much for listening! Read More…