Welcome to the tenth edition of Five Retro TV Commercials. Since I’m just now noticing that milestone, I can’t say that I have anything special planned. Just more old commercials.
Crest Toothpaste! (1980s)
As crazy as this one is, every kid-targeted toothpaste commercial was just as boisterous back then.
I guess they had to be. It was hard to get kids excited about toothpaste when they were being inundated with ads for video games and fruit snacks at the exact same time. You had to be over the top. You had to include hot pink yetis.
In any event, the commercial is a nice reminder of a time when I picked my toothpaste simply based on which one tasted the most like bubblegum. Nowadays I’m just like, “Which one of you fuckers is the most akin to corrosive bleach?” Getting old sucks, but at least I get to shout bizarre things in the dental care aisle. Read More…
I’m all-in on the new Ghostbusters toys, yo. It’s the first line in many years that’s compelled me to spend money recklessly. I’d never go so far to say that Mattel outdid Kenner’s Real Ghostbusters collection, but I think they’re paying it serious homage.
On that note, I’ve been trying to resist these Ghostbusters slime containers for weeks, but I knew I’d eventually cave.
They’re part of the Ecto Minis line, which blend the original and reboot universes together for a series of adorably tiny figurines. Those figures — sold in three-packs or as bagged singles — are fun to collect and have an excellent mouthfeel.
Each slime canister costs ten bucks, which sounds riotously unfair until you remember that stores charge as much as four dollars for one single Ecto Mini figure. Since each slime canister comes with a figure, the prices are par for the course. Read More…
Running Dino Drac takes lots of time, money and blood sacrifices, so if you enjoy what I do here, the best way to keep it going is by subscribing to Dino Drac’s Funpacks. June’s looking like a good month to start!
($25 MONTHLY SUBSCRIPTION BOX. UNITED STATES ONLY.)
The quick-and-dirty: Every month, I mail out a new Dino Drac Funpack, stuffed with all sorts of retro memorabilia and random nonsense. Subscriptions are handled via Paypal, and cost $25 each month. (Yes, that includes shipping.)
For as long as you stay subscribed, you’ll keep receiving new Funpacks every month. You can cancel at any time without penalty, and you’ll always receive the proper amount of Funpacks no matter when you do.
Scroll to the bottom of this post for additional information and to get your subscription started… or read on to see what’s in store for June!
There’s only one word to describe the June 2016 Funpack: Eclectic. No two items have more than a passing similarity, and that’s just the way I like it. There’s around a dozen items in every box, ranging from legit old school collectibles to bizarre jars full of Trolls.
Keep on reading to see the highlights, and remember: Every subscriber receives everything shown below! Read More…
It’s been four months since the last edition of Junk Food of the Gods, which means that I’ve missed the chance to immortalize so many limited edition snacks. I’m genuinely angry about this. I want to scream.
All I can do is pick up where I left off. Down below: More junk food.
Extra Toasty Cheez-Its!
Kellogg’s claims that this was their #1 most requested Cheez-It flavor, and I believe them. Count me among the apparent millions of Cheez-It fans who get irrationally excited about the burnt ones, which belie the fact that they’re rejects by tasting so much better than the Joe Normals.
Extra Toasty Cheez-Its aren’t nearly as overcooked as many would prefer, but they’re still way browner than normal Cheez-Its, with an added flavor that really does taste like burnt cheese crackers. Not Tabasco, not liquid smoke, but actual, honest-to-goodness burnt cheese crackers. And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.
So long as these exist, I’ll only buy regular Cheez-Its under protest. Read More…