Dinosaur Dracula!
Dinosaur Dracula

The Purple Stuff Podcast goes to THE MALL!

The Purple Stuff Podcast is back, and we’re ready to drop a show that’s been on our to-do list for years. Folks, it’s time to go to THE MALL!

…but not just ANY mall. We’re visiting a special magical mall that grants us access to ANY store from ANY mall from ANY point in time. Oh, the memories!

Join us as we visit Kay-Bee Toys, Waldenbooks, Sam Goody, Spencer Gifts and more. We even drop by the food court! Me and Jay from Sludge Central had an absolute blast reminiscing about our favorite mall stores, and we know this episode’s gonna spark a lot of memories for you guys, too!

Click here to listen to this week’s show!

As a reminder, we’re also on Patreon, where you can grab an exclusive bonus show each and every month. (This month, we pored over eBay to find the best and weirdest Ninja Turtles items on the auction block.)

Thanks so much for listening, for giving us solid reviews, and for sharing the show around! Enjoy!

Dino Drac’s March Funpack is here!

Wellp, time to unleash Dino Drac’s March Funpack!

Subscriptions are currently closed, but I do have a small amount that I can sell on an individual basis. Scroll to the bottom if you’re interested — but be warned, they will probably go quick!

If you’re already locked in for this month’s Funpack, I think you’re gonna be pleased! In addition to the usual suspects like sweet candy and old trading cards, this one includes one of the all-time best items from *any* Funpack ever.

Keep scrolling to learn about everything in this month’s box! Read More…

Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 39!

In this edition of Five Retro TV Commercials, you’ll see everything from Simpsons dolls to candy bars to exactly eight seconds’ worth of a vampire cinephile. Just another Tuesday on Dino Drac.

The Tortellis on NBC! (1987)

Count me among the eight people who actually watched The Tortellis, the much lesser-known of the two Cheers spin-offs. While Frasier hung around for 11 seasons, The Tortellis lasted for just five months.

No longer limited to Carla-related subplots, this was a whole show about Nick and Loretta Tortelli, now living in Las Vegas. I remember little about the stories, but I do recall the Tortelli abode looking like a weird amalgam of every sitcom set ever. It was like the Brady house mixed with Blanche’s living room mixed with the apartment from The Jeffersons. I loved that place.

The Tortellis could not have been a show that I deliberately sought out. As I recall, it spent most of its short run airing right after Night Court, which I did watch. I guess I was just basking in so much Rich Moll tomfoolery that I couldn’t be arsed to change the channel? Read More…

Movie Theater Memories: Part 3!

Welcome to the third edition of Movie Theater Memories, where I relive the experiences of seeing certain films at certain times in certain places.

I remember every movie I’ve seen in theaters. Not just the films, but where I was, who I saw them with, what candy I ate, and all of those tiny details that somehow make going to the movies feel like major life events.

If you were hoping for capsule reviews of beloved classics, I’m going to disappoint you. These articles are more about letting the mere mention of movies I saw in theaters guide me to entire days’ worth of memories…

Spaceballs!
(June 1987)

It was supposed to be the greatest day of my life, full stop. Not only were my parents taking me to see Spaceballs, but my father impulsively announced that we’d finally be going to Kid’s World, right after the movie!

Kid’s World was a then-newish New Jersey amusement park that I was constantly begging to visit, thanks to a series of TV commercials that made it look like heaven on Earth. In my head, it was some beautiful combination of Wildwood, Toys “R” Us and Wonka’s chocolate factory. To put it mildly, I was psyched.

But first on agenda was Spaceballs, which I was just as excited about. I felt like the only kid in school who still hadn’t given up on Star Wars, and to me, Spaceballs was almost as good as getting another Star Wars movie.

I loved it, and still do. I left the theater convinced that “WE AIN’T FOUND SHIT” was the funniest line in any movie ever, and wondering if Dark Helmet’s action figures would make it to toy stores. Course, by the time we got back to the car, all I could think about was Kid’s World.

I can’t remember if they called ahead or just checked the times in a brochure, but whatever the case, my parents realized that we’d only barely make it there before closing time. I pleaded that even 20 minutes would be enough, but my father, with the tone of a doctor giving his patient extremely bad news, said that Kid’s World was off the table.

The tears were immediate, and had only just stopped by the time we parked at some dive of a diner.

Once inside, I had a decision to make: Pout over Kid’s World, or revel in the fact that I just saw Pizza the Hutt. I surprised myself by choosing the latter, and began rattling off the inspirations for every Spaceballs character. As if my parents didn’t know that Barf was Chewbacca. Read More…