Happy Thoughts.

This space is reserved exclusively for happy thoughts. Here are seven of mine. What are some of yours?

Happy Thought #1: Aquafresh Toothpaste!

Aquafresh, I will keep on loving you. You amazed me as a child and you still amaze me today. You are triple-colored toothpaste and I don’t know how you exist. I’m sure I could find out, but why ruin the vision of white-clad witches casting spells over GlaxoSmithKline’s factory cauldrons?

It’s not even close to my favorite toothpaste, from a “flavor” perspective or even from a pure “clean my stupid mouth” perspective. But it’s the only one that looks like this, or at least, it’s the one most known for looking like this. I can’t turn it down. It’s art as fluoride. My teeth are a canvas. I bet that’s an Oasis lyric.

Happy Thought #2: TMNT Hothead Figure!

A good friend gave me some assorted Ninja Turtles figures, perhaps because she is roughly my age and did not know anyone else who would want assorted Ninja Turtles figures. Thank God for that. It was a great batch. I’ll save the rest for a rainy day, but I had to mention this one immediately.

Hothead was an obscure character in the TMNT universe, first appearing in the Archie comics and later in a video game, but never on the animated series, let alone the movies. I wrote about Hothead many years ago, but never actually owned the figure. He’s pretty rare. He’s also a crazy dragon.

It barely feels like a TMNT figure. The scale is correct, but the details feel so apart from the rest of the line. There’s also the matter of Hothead’s head, which pops up at us by way of an extending neck. Then there’s the fact that he looks like the come-to-life version of a Dragon Dance costume. Need I continue? We’d be here for hours.

Happy Thought #3: Dino Drac’s Patchwork Project!

Even days later, I still go back to look at it often. I neglected to give the completed Patchwork Project an on-blog mention, so if you haven’t seen the results, you really need to.

When I announced this, my high hopes were anchored by nagging doubts. Really, all this was ever going to be was a bunch of images of the same dimensions, smooshed together. Once the entries started pouring in, my fears vanished instantly. You guys really came through, and the “quilt” is just such a perfect summary of the “spirit” of our passions, however assorted they may be.

The Patchwork Project has become my muse. I thank you again for it.

Happy Thought #4: Dino Drac’s Comment Entry Thing!

Cliff swept in and saved the day. The comment entry field is no longer doing that weird thing where everything is garbled and nobody can comment easily. (Or, in many cases, at all.)

This pleases me. I hate it when the site has broken things. One of the million reasons to start anew was to avoid broken things. There are assuredly still broken things now, but at least they’re not as noticeable, and not on every page of the site. This is one giant leap for Mattkind.

Happy Thought #5: Lenox the Cat!

If you follow the site on Facebook, you might have seen my recent mention of Lenox’s dental work. All in, this ran around six hundred dollars. I hated the bill, but I love what it’s meant for our cat.

Lenox never seemed to be in pain, but there was a problem tooth that was clearly not going to fix itself. I can’t believe how much different he is with that tooth gone. It’s like he de-aged by five years. Lenox was already the most constantly gregarious of our cats, but now it’s like he’s some kind of archetype TV sitcom cat. He does everything right. He meows on cue. He hugs like a child. He does a freakin’ Hollywood pose when I shove him on the dining room table, on top of bouncy paintings. Proof’s in the picture.

If you have a pet that should see a vet, don’t put it off. Animals can’t tell you how badly they need it. Don’t let them get to the point of absolute misery before doing something. We did what we could as soon as we could, but I still feel guilty about waiting at all. The bright side is that I now have a really old cat who thinks he’s a really young cat. Go, Lenox, go.

Happy Thought #6: This T-shirt!

My friend D sent me this incredible shirt, which was apparently only on sale for five minutes from one retailer. I’m exaggerating, but it’s still a damn fine shirt. Teenage Mutant Ninja Gremlins. Two of my most beloved things, together at last. I love how their faces are all fuzzy, even if it makes zero sense for them to be. Thank you, D!

I should also take this opportunity to mess with your head. Let’s look at the word “shirt.” Let’s really look at it. “Shirt.” Shirt. Shirt. Isn’t is a weird word? Doesn’t it look weird and sound weird? I never noticed this before, but I’ve become completely stuck on it. And now, so have you. It’s in your brain and it’s never gonna go away. You handle that.

Happy Thought #7: Smucker’s Goober!

I have not opened this. I’ve never had it before.

I don’t eat peanut butter often. I like it just fine; our paths just rarely seem to cross. But the jelly thing has always been a problem. I have never accepted a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, not even once. The very idea of it repulsed me.

But after exploring the reasons for this, I concluded that weren’t any good reasons. I like bread. I like peanut butter. Jelly isn’t my favorite thing, but I’m not morally opposed to it. I’ve been treating peanut butter & jelly like a sin for my entire life, with no justification at all. It needs to stop.

What better way to jump over that hurdle than with a jar of Smucker’s Goober? I’ve been staring at this shit forever, and it killed me that I couldn’t take part. Oh, those beautiful stripes! This is like the Aquafresh thing gone berserk.

I don’t know when I’ll try it, or even if I ever will. Simply buying the jar was hard enough for me. I will also admit that “eating” it wasn’t really why I bought it. Part of me wants to use it to paint outsider art. A bigger part of me wants to smash the jar on the sidewalk and take photos of the results. In my head, that seems eerily beautiful.

Still, simply allowing the direct mix of peanut butter and jelly to sit in my kitchen is a huge step. I’m slowly picking off the stupidest of my hang-ups, one by one. That’s a happy thought.

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