Dinosaur Dracula!

Vlog: Christmas Morning, 2012.

Christmas Eve was the usual unbridled insanity, but for once, we didn’t need to be anywhere on Christmas Day. I’m going to spend the afternoon taped to the couch, subsisting on cold leftovers and endless airings of A Christmas Story. Just the way it ought to be.

I hope you’re having a good one, filled with whatever you wanted it to be filled with.

Here’s a video examining some of the more interesting presents I received this year, from Oreo cookies to skull-shaped liquor decanters:

If I sound groggy, it’s because I am. Merry Xmas!

Dino Drac’s Advent Calendar: 12/24/12.

It’s Christmas Eve!

…and the final gift is a DOOZY.

Behold, Dino Drac’s BABY DINOSAUR, which hatched from a giant grey egg and immediately started doing cute things. Impossibly cute things, like clapping. God, we LOVE this baby dinosaur. Read More…

The Christmas Flamingo Cometh.

I have to imagine that this will be my last big purchase of the Christmas season. I’m going out with a pink bang:

It’s a light-up flamingo in a Santa hat, and it pairs oh so nicely with that stupid dinosaur. This is its story, in around five minutes:

The people behind this flamingo apparently decided that it needed to be “frozen,” so they glued tiny silica boulders all over it. But they didn’t glue them on too well, and you can’t touch this thing without having it spit silica everywhere. I’ve decided to like this. A+ on the festive flamingo.

PS: Follow Dino Drac on Facebook. For no good reason, really.

Ancient Christmas Appetizers!

This morning, I dived deep into my collection of ancient recipe books, looking for the kind of snack ideas that no book published after 1975 would dare include.

After choosing my “subjects,” it was time to gather the ingredients. Good God, I spent a fortune. I’m not sure what happened, since I specifically chose recipes that seemed not only easy, but cheap.

Oh well. Christmas only comes once a year, and it’s not like I ever pay attention to these old recipe books when it’s not Christmastime. If I was gonna blow a hundred bucks on cream cheese and bootleg caviar, I picked the right day.

Below are four of my creations, based on recipes from Better Homes & Gardens’ 1963 classic, Snacks and Refreshments. May they bring you good tidings, and inspire you to do wacky things with black olives. Read More…

Dino Drac’s Advent Calendar: 12/21 – 12/23/12.

Dino Drac hates today’s magnifying glass, but I don’t. I love how Playmobil made it all jewel-like and oversized, as if it’s actually a supernatural crystal-gazing thing that will let us see the future.

“So you wanna see the future, eh? Then let me open tomorrow’s gift.”

I don’t even put up a fight, anymore. He’s too hard to argue with. Too many dismissive hand gestures. Read More…