Vintage Vending

What the hell happened to vending machine slime, anyway? Once the most ubiquitous vending machine prize outside of gumballs, it’s now been more than ten years since I last saw those gorgeous capsules of neon snot. And it’s not like I haven’t been looking. It’s hard to imagine tha

In this edition of Vintage Vending, I'm covering two totally different sets, bridged by the fact that they're both so damn spooky. Come check out slimy hands and rubber rats!

This time on Vintage Vending, I’m quintupling up. I usually feature just one set of old vending machine prizes in each edition, but this time, you’re getting five. (And okay, I’ll admit that that’s largely because none of the sets featured here deserved individual tributes.) If you

In this edition of Vintage Vending, we’re gonna take a look at Squash Faces. I realize that none of you have heard of them before, nor have you even seen the words “squash” and “faces” paired together. I live to change lives, in the smallest and stupidest ways possible. I don’

It’s been forever since the last edition of Vintage Vending, the series in which I blather on endlessly about old vending machine toys. If you’re newish to Dino Drac, you can read the past twenty-one entries over here! Today we’re focusing on “The Stretcher” set, made in 1995, an

On today’s edition of Vintage Vending, you will bow before the mighty power of a glow-in-the-dark sticky fist. Truth. The “Wrecking Power” collection arrived in the early ‘90s, and while it isn’t as showy as many of the sets previously featured on Dino Drac, I think I’m in love

It’s been over two months since my last post, because stuff happens, and we must sometimes accept that life is a big ball of shit aimed directly at our heads. But I didn’t want to let Memorial Day — my 16th favorite holiday — slide by without some Dino Drac action. So here�

It’s been over four months since the last edition of Vintage Vending. Let’s fix that. HERE ARE BALLOONS. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles balloons, even! This is from 1989, when literally everything branded with a Ninja Turtles logo was a must-buy. Though the teaser card lacks a sample, we

Okay, this has gotta be the weirdest edition of Vintage Vending yet. LOOK AT THIS THING! No formal title for the collection was provided, I guess because “Bugs & Fish Guts” would’ve been more polarizing than fetching. Everything about it is off. I’ll describe the indivi

The Vintage Vending series returns with an incredibly seasonal addition. From 1994, get a load of the HALLOWEEN HORRORS collection! We’ve seen better prizes in the past, but on card art alone, this may be my favorite entry yet. I’ve seen plenty of vending assortments with “horror”

I’ve been visibly absent these past few days, but it was for a good cause. Been getting ahead on a few things for this year’s Halloween Countdown. This may be the first time in forever that I’m actually over-prepared, at least in terms of having enough topics to cover 40+ spooky post

The first sentence is always hardest, unless you kill it with bullshit like this. Today on Vintage Vending, meet the Pom Poms! Six adorably fuzzy beasts from God knows where, ready to offer us love and companionship! Their feet are stickers! We’ll see more of them in a bit. First, we got

The “Magic Tricks and Jokes” assortment is like an old Johnson Smith ad come to life. The collective charm far outweighs the fact that every item on the card is a hunk of junk, at least in the practical sense.

Last night on Dino Drac’s Facebook page, I randomly opened an old pack of Garbage Pail Kids. Doing so stirred many memories of my childhood GPK obsession, which had some incredible highs and lows. If you were alive at the time, you should remember the highs. Collecting Garbage Pail Kids

In this issue of Vintage Vending: More dinosaurs! I would’ve been all over this Dinosaur Museum set as a kid. (And given that I would’ve been of the appropriate age in 1985, I’m sad that I missed the chance.) The stars were a series of skeletal figures, meant to represent museum-asse

Vintage Vending continues with the Dinosaur Park Collection, an assortment of cheap dinosaur stuff that probably isn’t at old as it looks. The title has to be a nod to Jurassic Park, right? If so, this collection would’ve been from around 1993. Jurassic Park spiked interest in dinosaur

Vintage Vending continues! I’m calling today’s batch “Assorted Awesomeness,” but the prizes really aren’t so hot. Actually, I would’ve skipped this one entirely… if not for one totally killer prize hiding among the weaklings. Take a look, and see if you can guess which it is.

In today’s video, the Vintage Vending series continues with a trip to Las Vegas: Though you might expect a “Las Vegas” prize assortment to have everything to do with casinos and vacations, this one doesn’t. No, this one comes with a plastic machine gun. …but it’s not like such

This is a special video edition of Vintage Vending, because I am just so tired of writing. …though I guess I should write a little, for the sake of Google hits from people searching for “fuzzy bear brooches” and “birds with tools for heads.” This time, the prize assortment is com

Vintage Vending continues, with ROCKS. This is not going to be my most popular review. I ain’t gonna front. I love this. I love, love, love this. Polished stones always thrill me, even when they’re presented as tacky jewelry. I would’ve been all over these prizes as a kid, and probab

It’s been ages since the last Vintage Vending post. Let’s fix that. Pinpointing an exact date is impossible. All I can be sure of is that these came out in the ‘80s. The “Moon Monster” title was just their way of skirting copyright issues, because these are obviously Godzilla toy

I’m in a good mood today. It’s important to use good moods for good things. I can think of no better way to channel my positivity than by describing fake vomit. On with another edition of Vintage Vending! Frankenstein’s Spare Parts Collection came out in ’89, though it looks decad

If you thought the Vintage Vending series was taking a break during the Countdown, you have no future as a psychic. Some of those old prizes absolutely scream “Halloween,” and if you think I’m reaching, just take a look at this one: A macabre mix of Madballs and Ghoulies! Meet the Wa

I know you were expecting a full tour of Iguana’s house, but I haven’t had a chance to complete it yet. My printer isn’t being cooperative, and without going into detail on why I need a printer to build a house for a paper lizard, I assure you that I absolutely do. So that will

Today we recall a true old faithful of the twenty-five cent prize arena: Sticky toys that stuck to things with their stickiness. It’s Sticky Stuff! A collection of gooey doodads that will, quote, discolor paint! Yessss! The photo looks bad, but rest assured, it’s just as blurry and cru