Dinosaur Dracula!

The Mostly-Complete Dino Drac Archives.

You have some reading to do!

Below are most of the Dino Drac blog archives. Certain categories may be excluded to keep things tidier. If you notice any typos, pretend you didn’t.

  • What’s the weirdest thing in your wallet?

    I’ll never turn down the chance to go through someone’s wallet. It doesn’t matter if I like the person, hate the person or even really know the person. I just want to see what’s in there, and make a totally unfair analysis of the wallet’s owner based on its contents. I don’t th

  • Boys’ Life Magazine Ads.

    Boys’ Life is the official magazine of the Boy Scouts of America. It ruled my childhood. I was in the Scouts, but that had nothing to do with it. All of my grade school buddies were in the Scouts. It was just kind of a given that we would be. For us, it was essentially

    Snowmonster.

    I don’t like to waste a good snowfall. When we got that blizzard last night, I knew I’d spend today turning snow into icy hot Dino Drac content. And I did. I’d preemptively Googled for “things to do with snow” (that was literally my search string), ultimately locating

  • Polly-O Pizzeria String Cheese.

    Today’s youth may take string cheese for granted, but me? No way. Never. I knew a world without string cheese, and it was as black as tar. Polly-O String Cheese came out when I was still in elementary school, and while I’m not motivated enough to do the math, that was, suffice to s

  • Mad Mascots: Clanky Syrup Spaceman!

    Kids of the ‘60s loved astronauts arguably more than anything else, thanks largely to the Space Race. A quick browse through any photo collection of ‘60s toys will show an unmistakable lean on spacemen and rocket ships, and really, the old cliche of kids “wanting to become astr

  • Nintendo Trophy Figures.

    This is a Nintendo Trophy Figure, from 1988. I know it doesn’t look like much, but remember, there weren’t many Nintendo toys at all at that time. These things were gold-by-default. It was a surprisingly large collection, with characters representing three of the era’s biggest g

  • The Best Chest.

    Today is my birthday. The last few minutes of it, anyway. I’m 34. It feels outrageously old. As some of you know, I’m weird about birthdays. Actually, I’m much weirder about birthdays than I’ve ever let on. When it’s time to sing the birthday song to someone, I hide in the back a

  • Vintage Vending #9: Las Vegas!

    In today’s video, the Vintage Vending series continues with a trip to Las Vegas: Though you might expect a “Las Vegas” prize assortment to have everything to do with casinos and vacations, this one doesn’t. No, this one comes with a plastic machine gun. …but it’s not like such

  • Mad Mascots: Trump!

    Remember when I wrote about Bigg Mixx? I think we should turn that into a series. A series about mad mascots. There are many bewilderingly beautiful brand mascots deserving of short tributes and crudely assembled image collages, and it is my intention to give them what’s owed! …let’

  • A post filled with random things.

    It’s a lazy Saturday afternoon. I’m sitting in front of the television, but it isn’t on. All I see is the vague, smeary reflection of me, looking strangely demonic. I’m drinking coffee from a mug that says “coffee” on it. Next to me is a cat that wants to eat people food. I can

  • Fake Gazpacho Recipe.

    Gazpacho is a cold vegetable soup, something like tomato soup, but even more like chopped vegetables with tomato juice thrown on top. At least, the best kinds are. Here’s how to make a super easy and quick gazpacho, though it comes with the admission that this technically isn’t gazpach

  • Vlog: Popeye Shredded Bubble Gum!

    A new feature is up, covering ten more old comic book ads. Good ones, too. Everything from Game Genies to Brach’s Rocks. Read it. …or read it after you watch today’s video, in which I examine Popeye Shredded Bubble Gum. Made in 1981 and likely inspired by Big League Chew, Popeye’s

  • Five Random ’80s Action Figures, Part 2!

    Okay, so there’s this huge indoor/outdoor flea market in Englishtown that I’ve been going to for like, twenty years now. It’d been a long time since my previous visit, so yesterday afternoon, we drove out to see what treasures awaited. Turned out, not many treasures awaited. It’s t

  • Vintage Vending #8: Small Parts A’Plenty!

    This is a special video edition of Vintage Vending, because I am just so tired of writing. …though I guess I should write a little, for the sake of Google hits from people searching for “fuzzy bear brooches” and “birds with tools for heads.” This time, the prize assortment is com

  • Crazy Good Multi Movie Horror DVD.

    Omigawd. This is the best DVD set ever, or close to it. You’ve seen those “multi movie” horror packs before, and while this is thematically no different, the included movies are JUST SO INCREDIBLY GREAT. This is total instant party material – a cavalcade of cult classics with a hea

  • 5 Grisly Things About Living in a Medieval Castle.

    I’m obsessed with medieval castles, but they were scary. Aside from the lack of every conceivable convenience that we now take for granted, life was just so much more brutal during the Middle Ages. Yeah, duh, but I don’t just mean that in an “enemy invaders with big swords” sort of

  • Play-Doh Valentines Bag!

    Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and with it, tons of new candies and novelties in shades that fall somewhere between bubble gum pink and horse blood red. I normally don’t pay too close attention to these things, but the 2013 haul is pretty interesting. I’ll cover a few of my fin

  • Vintage Vending #7: Gemstones!

    Vintage Vending continues, with ROCKS. This is not going to be my most popular review. I ain’t gonna front. I love this. I love, love, love this. Polished stones always thrill me, even when they’re presented as tacky jewelry. I would’ve been all over these prizes as a kid, and probab

  • Unboxing Rocky Road Cereal, from 1986.

    I hadn’t intended for this to become an ’80s week on Dino Drac. It just worked out that way. And now I shall make it official by opening a box of cereal from 1986. I don’t know exactly when Rocky Road Cereal went out of production, but it did, and people miss it. Not all

    Charms of the 1980s, Reexamined.

    From kindergarten through the third grade, I don’t think a school day went by that I didn’t see at least six dozen of those plastic “charms.” You know, the ones with the little bells attached, typically clipped onto long neon chains? This photo tells the story better than I can: Th