Dino Drac’s May Funpack is here!
Dino Drac’s May Funpack is here! Actually, they’ve already been shipped to all official subscribers, so if you were already on the list, it’s on the way!
To everyone else: Subscriptions are currently closed, but I have a fair number of spares that I can offer on an individual basis. The price is $25, and that includes shipping to anywhere in the United States. Jump to the bottom for ordering info!
The May 2025 Funpack takes you on a journey into the DARK CARNIVAL, where good times are sandwiched between moments of extreme danger, and everything smells like funnel cakes.
Again, you can skip to the bottom if you’re ready to order, or keep reading to learn about everything in this month’s box!
First up, from the wizards at Terror-Vision Records & Video, you’ll each receive a factory-fresh, sealed copy of the Friday the 13th score, on audiocassette!
These are officially-licensed, all-pro cassettes produced with Terror-Vision’s perpetually-perfectionist touch. These aren’t vintage tapes – they’re brand new, and if you can still find a tape deck, they’re ready to play!
Even if you don’t have a cassette player, these sure look great on a shelf, with that killer artwork on the insert. The cassette shells are in a gorgeously gory red color, and they really pop.
PS: June 13th just happens to fall on a Friday, so you’ll get your tape in time to celebrate properly!
Next up is another haunted home run from my friends at House of Wax Melts — the Dark Carnival Wax Melts set! Inside each custom case is three ounces’ worth of wax cubes that smell like.. well, a carnival!
Think funnel cakes, cotton candy and caramel apples, beautifully blended into six break-off cubes that will afford you multiple rounds of macabre merriment. This is one of my favorite “flavors” in their lineup, and to celebrate the vibes of a dark carnival, House of Wax Melts juiced it up with slick-and-drippy cotton candy colors, plus sprinkles!
I can’t say enough good things about these. If you don’t have a wax melt burner, they’re very affordable and super worth it. But, honestly, the wax smells so good on its own that you could probably just use it as potpourri and be happy. I love these!
You’ll also receive three rare packs of ThunderCats album “stickers” from Venezuela — in quotes because they’re not really stickers, but rather tiny cards that look like stickers, which were originally meant to be glued into a sticker album, Panini-style.
These were made by Reyauca, who did oodles of similar sets for all sorts of properties in the ‘80s. The cards are crude and the packs are OLD. You can expect them to look (and maybe even smell) a bit funky. A small price to pay for such an obscure piece of ThunderCats history!
No Funpack is complete without something you can eat, so here’s a pair of snacks!
You’ll receive a fresh packet of Cotton Candy Pop Rocks, which is entirely appropriate for a dark carnival. You’ll also get a Quaker S’mores Granola Bar, because s’mores lead to campfires and campfires lead to Friday the 13th.
See? Actual thought goes into this madness!
This month’s 5×7” cardstock mini-poster reproduces an old print ad for Circus Fun Cereal from the ‘80s, which is roughly on-brand for a vaguely carnival-themed Funpack. I suppose the 2×2” Glo Worm sticker is less on-topic, but he’s cute, so I think you’ll forgive that.
Rounding things out, you’ll get this month’s Funpack Newsletter, plus an exclusive essay that will never be reprinted on the site. (This month’s essay is about how “Macho Man” Randy Savage allegedly lived in my hometown, and how that drove me completely bananas as a wrestling fan in the late ‘80s.)
Oh, and what the heck? I’ll also toss in a pack of Independence Day trading cards, from 1996. We’re barreling towards the summer, so it feels like the right time to make you look at Jeff Goldblum and space aliens.
So yep, you’ll get everything shown here – plus maybe a minor surprise or two – for $25, shipped to anywhere in the United States! (U.S. only, please!)
If you’re already a subscriber, you’re all set, and your Funpack is already on its way!
If you’re not a subscriber but still want this box, you can purchase it by clicking the button below. I have a limited supply left, and once they’re gone, they’re gone forever!
Thanks so much! Subscriber boxes have shipped, and all new orders will ship on Tuesday May 27th. If you order now, please note that your box may not arrive until the first week of June. Don’t worry, nothing will go stale in those extra few days!
