Paas Mini-Monsters Easter Egg Kit!

Easter is approaching. As longtime readers know, it’s far from my favorite holiday, owing to everything from its hideous pastel colors to the customary dish of a “leg of lamb”– something I find so atrocious that it took me a literal minute to even type it.

But there are good things about Easter, too. Namely the eggs. Dyeing hardboiled eggs never gets old. If you disagree with that, you’re in luck, because there are kits available that let you do a heck of a lot more than just “dye” the eggs. This is one example. Perhaps the best example.

It’s a kit that allows us to turn eggs into “Mini-Monsters.” Paas didn’t hyphenate it, but I’m going to.

I can’t remember what it cost. Two bucks, maybe? For some reason, egg dyeing kits never seem to be as horribly overpriced as other holiday items. There’s only so much you can charge for a couple of dye tablets and a wire “egg dipper” that never, ever works as well as a normal spoon.

Did I have reservations? Yes! This must be Paas’s ten trillionth Easter egg kit, and having seen so many of them, I know that they’re hit-or-miss. Or is that hit-and-miss? The second one seems more commonly used, but the first one makes more sense. If you’re reading this and thinking that I sound half-asleep, your insight serves you well. It’s three o’ clock in the morning.

You get everything shown above. Dr. Frankenstein, meet Lisa Frank.

In truth, it was the promise of “fuzzy hair” that drew me in. Look at that little orange fuzzball. There’s no way that isn’t going to do good shit to eggs.

Among the other inclusions are pipe cleaners, glitter glue, and a sticker sheet with a disproportionate eyes-to-mouths ratio. Some estimates put it at sixteen eyes per mouth. Paas can get away with this, since “monsters” need not apply to the standard Rules of Faces.

Dyeing the eggs was easy enough. I went with the tried-and-true “water and vinegar” mix, though according to the directions, vinegar wasn’t mandatory. But screw that. I remember a time when my family used nothing but vinegar to mix with the dye, and it will be a cold day in hell before I exclude it entirely.

Besides, I’d previously bought a really awful bottle of rice vinegar, and if I don’t use it for something like egg dyeing, it’s just going to sit in my kitchen cabinet, serving no purpose other than “obstacle as I reach for Saltines” for the next five years.

Hmm. My color choices and egg placement came eerily close to supporting Microsoft Windows.

When it came time to do wacky monster stuff to the eggs, I was shocked. The assorted materials actually did what they were supposed to do! Even the crappy glitter glue worked fine, and I would’ve bet my life savings of $200 and three dented cans of Surge that it’d have no adhesive quality at all.

I’ll spare you the play-by-play on Steps #5-30. Just know that I spent a good 45 minutes decorating these eggs, breaking only for a Jodi Arias highlight reel and two rounds of Candy Crush. If somebody set me on fire, I would not blame them.

My Mini-Monster eggs came out okay. They’re a bit too simple, but I didn’t want to add personal touches that went outside the parameters of the kit’s contents. I felt like it would be cheating. Or maybe I was just lazy.

When I make my real Easter eggs, I like to go balls-to-the-wall. You can’t make Easter eggs at my age and not go balls-to-the-wall. Crazy color patterns, weird designs, the whole nine yards. This kit only let me go so far, but remembering that it’s meant for kids who can only go so far, it’s pretty sweet.

There aren’t many Easter egg kits that will let you make monsters with pipe cleaner arms and Beaker hair. In fact, to date, I’ve only seen one.

This guy is my favorite. I like his pink coon cap. Or maybe that’s a Coral Snow corn snake? It would explain the egg’s faint hint of omg-ness.

33 Responses to Paas Mini-Monsters Easter Egg Kit!

  1. My in-laws love l*g of l*mb. I too find it disgusting. If it requires mint goo to make it palatable, it’s time to try a new dish.

    Why don’t you have some PORK BUTT instead?

  2. $2 well spent.

    I loved the Paas finger puppets as a kid. They’re surprisingly hard to find on the secondary market. Stop making me waste more money on eBay. :)

  3. Baaw, that looks really fun. I want to paint eggs this year, but I just can’t see eggs, dye, and a 12 month old going together well. Maybe I should consult Pinterest.

  4. this is an easter i can get behind. the blue one on the box looks so dapper. how can i not enjoy?

  5. Someone on twitter referred to lamb as “salmon-flavored beef.” You know it’s true.

  6. I really dislike lamb. It has this…overly fatty flavor that makes me gag just from smelling it.

    Now I’m considering going out and buying one of these kits. It’s been about 700 years since I last dyed some eggs. Easter is probably my least favorite holiday, but these eggs are all Halloween-ish. I’m down with that.

  7. The only experience I had with Easter lamb was the one time my mom thought it would be a good idea to make it.
    Not, like, one hair that fell in while cooking … the MEAT HAD HAIR ALL OVER IT. Good god! I hear this is a common thing?! It was gross and makes me gag to think about, even to this day. It was the worst thing to happen to Easter since White “Chocolate”. (Begin white “chocolate” debate now!)

  8. These just aren’t monstrous enough for me. I’ll hold out until they make the hideous monster kit.

    Looks like I’ll never be dying eggs.

  9. I just put this on my list of “Stuff I have to get cause Matt recomends it.”
    Seriously, I would not think of going a year without dying eggs. And yes, vinegar is a must. Also part of the tradition is my mother always telling the story of how the dies were so much stronger and brighter back in the old days.
    But they didn’t have the PAAS mini-monsters then did they mom?! Huh, did they?

  10. How does hit-AND-miss make sense? How do you simultaneously hit and miss something? Matt, you crazy.

  11. Like Stark, I, too, have an etymology question. Please explain the phrase “balls-to-the-wall”.

  12. I don’t remember ever dying eggs as a youngster. I remember my mom mentioning that she was going to do it, then there were odd colored eggs in the refrigerator. Thanks to my girlfriend, I don’t really have a choice in the matter now. That being the case, this kit would probably make it much more enjoyable.

    Odd but true, I can’t bring myself to eat the dyed eggs. I love hard boiled eggs, and I know there’s nothing wrong with them after they’ve been colored, but I can’t bring myself to do it. Maybe it’s a color thing, since I could never bring myself to try the green ketchup either.

  13. cool Easter eggs. For the past few years we have had lamb cake, never actual lamb.

  14. Lamb is a traditional easter dish? I don’t even know where I could buy lamb around here. Although one time I had a gyro and liked it. Around here, it’s always been ham.

    Loved the Jodi Arias joke.

  15. “Please explain the phrase ‘balls-to-the-wall’.”Rev Vice Queen 13

    Everything you need to know is explained in this highly informative video with a German midget that has a face like a cross between Klaus Kinski and a potato.

  16. Those are some handsome eggs there. :) They didn’t have this kit at CVS, so I just bought the regular type for my kid. If you’ve never seen a four year old decorate eggs before I can tell you they will look monstrous despite the kit used.

  17. My mother’s side of the family is Greek so lamb was always part of the annual dinner. yes, Mint Jelly and apple sauce was also provided. The Greek temple was always raffling off lambs and one year my grandfather won it. This lamb was in our back yard for several weeks and my mother and I grew rather fond of it which was trouble when it came time for dinner. My grandfather couldn’t bring himself to do the deed so my uncle did. Neither I nor my mother ate lamb for years afterwards.

    PAAS was always a middle of the road as far as dye kits went. There were decent goodies and stickers packed inside and sometimes they adhered and sometimes they didn’t. Of course the “twirly tops” were just the cardboard cutouts you got when you used the box to dry your eggs in. One year my family was hitting it rough and mom bought these cheep 99 cent egg wraps that had Voltron on them, yes Voltron, the cool one with the Lions.

    Do you remember Dudley’s decorating kits? They were the Cadillac of egg dyeing and priced as such. The box had a picture of a stupid looking rabbit on it and you colored your egg by dropping it in a Shake and Bake style baggie. On a hunch I checked youtube and found a very disturbing commercial. Watch at your own peril.

  18. The thing I could never get over with coloring eggs was that coloring them didn’t change the fact that they were still just eggs. You had the choice of eating jelly beans, Cadbury eggs, chocolate eggs, marshmallow eggs, malted (Whopper) eggs or … hard-boiled eggs?? If only Paas could devise a way to color the eggs AND simultaneously transform the interiors to candy, then I’d be in.

  19. I say, Juge, that WAS informative! So, it mostly has to do with tight leather pants then? I do not contain balls myself, at least not physically, but I imagine if I did, the wall would be the last place I’d put them. Thank you as always for helping me solve life’s little mysteries!

  20. @Stark: You are correct. I mistyped. The stupid version has more Google hits, it seems. Hit or miss makes more sense.

  21. can you still get dudley egg decorating stuff? I would throw a huge fit every frikkin year because my mom mom wouldn’t spend like 15 dollars on a dudley kit. Oh how I would pout and fuss…

    I actually do a new thing…batik patterns you dye the shell which has like different shapes of tape which are white when you are done peeling them…

  22. oh i saw the commercial….I had the blow up egg thing….and a blow up dudley

  23. Egg-decorating was mandatory and popular in my crafty, creative family. Every year, on the day before Easter, my siblings, mother, and I would spend at least an hour or so with hard-boiled eggs, dye, water, vinegar, and crayons and paint the most elaborate eggs our imaginations could concoct. Mom and the girls got so good at dyeing the egg so it looked like it had a band of four colors. I could never do it like them – I preferred solid-colored eggs with fancy crayon scrolls or my initials.

    Mom generally used regular food dye – she said it worked the best – but she’d sometimes buy PAAS, or more rarely, Dudley. We were happy with either. They both came with nifty accessories.

    Mom still dyes eggs with my sister and her two sons to this day. I’ll have to ask her if she uses PAAS or still goes for the food dye.

  24. The yellow one… his name is Eggsaronius and the pink thing on his head is a Marshmellow Peep’s poop.

  25. The picture of the four colored eggs is beautiful and its simplicity and may be my Easter wallpaper background. I haven’t bought a kit in a few years the last one being a Transformers one that came with some stickers and crappy cardboard appendages.

  26. Didn’t you have an article on X-E with Monster Eggs that you made yourself? Maybe Paas is lifting your ideas.

  27. Yeah, leg of lamb must be a regional thing. Ham is the traditional Easter dinner down here in my neck of the woods.

    Steve beat me to it, but yeah, I think somebody at Paas read your Halloween Easter eggs article and thought, “Well, we can’t make dye kits for Halloween…that doesn’t make any damn sense…but we can bring Halloween to Easter!” You deserve a cut of that sweet Mini-Monster Easter egg money, Matt!

    That being said, we usually do Easter with the whole famn damily and the adults hide eggs for the kids to hunt. When we buy the egg dye, I’ll have to see if I can find this kit.

  28. Lamb is delicious. Also, when I eat lamb, I think of eating Goat, like so many of my medieval heroes.


  30. dont know anything about lamb for easter. news to me.

    love dyeing eggs and now that i know how to make deviled eggs i can even eat them. almost my entire life and definately my entire childhood i was jealous that everyone seemed to eat easter eggs and i would or could not.

    glad i discovered deviled eggs. it made easter more relevant to me.

    never had lamb though. would like to try it unless it had anything to do with mint jelly.

  31. I’ve never had lamb either.

  32. Egg dyeing is a Good Friday tradition at home and I take it seriously. Can’t rightly say that I go balls to the wall, being a girl and all, but for someone who doesn’t eat hard boiled eggs I have dyed my fingers all the colors of the rainbow in the pursuit of making them pretty for the Easter dinner table. Personally, I’ve never had lamb on Easter, unless butter in the shape of a lamb counts. It’s always been ham and kolbas in my family. My boyfriends’ family, however, does eat lamb though they don’t do Easter. I’ve had roast lamb with them once. Not bad, but not something I could eat often. Once a year would probably be pushing it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *