The Mausoleum of Madness!

Welcome to Dino Drac’s Mausoleum of Madness! Here you’ll find daily drops of creepy collectibles from my personal collection, all never previously seen on the site. Everything from eerie ephemera to terrifying toys. There are some major gems waiting to be featured here! Feature now complete for the season!

#21: “Spookjes” Happy Meal! (1995)

Here’s an interesting and very rare McDonald’s translite from 1995. If you’ll recall, the October ’95 Happy Meal in the United States featured McDonaldland figures in snap-on Halloween costumes. Well, over in the Netherlands, they got this variation!

The Dutch word “Spookjes” roughly translates to “little ghosts.” See, in the Netherlands, Halloween was hardly on anyone’s radar, and certainly wouldn’t be the theme of a McDonald’s Happy Meal. So Ronald transformed what was clearly a Halloween thing in the States into a more generic “spooky” Happy Meal for the Netherlands.

While the set of toys was mostly unchanged from what we got here, you might notice that they swapped Birdie’s original jack-o’-lantern costume for a witch outfit. (Obviously because jack-o’-lanterns are inarguably Halloweeny.) That makes the “Witch Birdie” figure – which I own – one of the rarest McDonald’s Halloween toys of ‘em all!

#20: Count Chocula Cereal! (1986)

This box of Count Chocula comes from a time when the Monster Cereals were still available all year, but it counted as the Count’s “Halloween edition” in 1986.

That year, every box of Count Chocula came with a free pair of “Wacky Wax” wax lips. There were five styles available, and if you look closely, three of them kinda sorta reflected Count Chocula, Franken Berry and Boo Berry.

It was probably this promotion that turned me onto wax lips in the first place. I was a huge fan of those as a kid, not so much for the thrill of wandering around with phony lips, but simply because I loved the flavor. LIke a cross between Nik-L-Nips and potpourri!

#19: “Witch Time” Reaper! (1980s)

I showed you one of Telco’s classic Motion-ettes of Halloween earlier in this feature, but Telco had many imitators. In the late ‘80s and early ‘90s, gobs of no-name companies made their own versions of the Motion-ettes.

They’re universally of inferior quality, and most of them are Hard Passes, but there are a few that stand out. Like this one, for instance! From Witch Time in the late ‘80s, this white-robed reaper is unlike anything Telco produced, and the truth is, I like him just as much as anything Telco did produce.

Standing around 17 inches tall, this angel of death has spooky green eyes, oddly-human hands, and carries an illuminated jack-o’-lantern. He also blasts that same “sonic” sound that most of these figures do, but mercifully, the audio is optional.

#18: Magic Glow Worms! (1971)

Fleer’s Magic Glow Worms and Bed Bugs was an odd title for what these actually were: Packs of temporary tattoos with a bonus stick of bubble gum.

Admittedly, the tattoos were of various creepy creatures, and they did glow in the dark, so I guess they paid off the name well enough.

I don’t do ‘70s nostalgia on Dino Drac often – mostly because I wasn’t alive for it – but I know a gem when I see it, and a boy turning green with fright over the temporary tattoos that he himself chose to affix is definitely a gem.

This is a complete display box, but even individual packs aren’t cheap. They are oddly plentiful, though, and so many of them are in really nice condition. Makes me wonder if someone uncovered a boatload of factory-fresh cases in more recent years? If you’re out there, fess up!

#17: Russ “Vampire” Troll! (1990s)

At the height of Troll mania in the early ‘90s, Russ Trolls unleashed this gothic god. There were other vampire Troll dolls on the market, but this one was my fave. The gray skin really set him apart.

I’m not sure if I’ve ever confessed this, but I was a Troll MANIAC back then. I practically grew up in Atlantic City, surrounded by arcade crane machines, which of course was where Troll dolls bred and multiplied.

I had dozens of those dolls – small ones and big ones, dressed like everything from sleepy wizards to punk rockers. For a year or so, they were all over my bedroom. A hundred Troll eyes on me during my most private moments.

Eventually, I realized that a room full of Trolls could be trouble if anyone in junior high ran opposition research. I remember tossing them all in a bag and hiding them in my closet. Dunno what became of them after that. Hopefully, they escaped and found better homes.

#16: 7UP Halloween Cans! (1990s)

While the cans are undated, all signs point to them being from the ‘90s. The Cool Spot cameos are a dead giveaway, as is the prominent “NutraSweet” logo on that diet can.

I absolutely adore the jack-o’-lantern spin on the Cool Spots. I’ve noticed giant-sized plush dolls of them on eBay, which I’m assuming were store displays. If you’re wondering why those dolls are still on eBay and not here in the Mausoleum of Madness, it’s because people are charging like a thousand dollars for them. WTF?

For maximum impact, you have to envision dozens of these cans in a tub of ice, in the center of a grade school Halloween party. Kids dressed like Bart Simpson and the red Power Ranger grabbing them left and right, while a Drew’s Famous CD blasts a bad cover of Thriller.

#15: Disney Haunted House Album! (1964)

At one point or another, I feel like everybody owned a copy of this album. Released in 1964, Disney’s Chilling, Thrilling Sounds of the Haunted House is *still* an easy find at yard sales and thrift stores. Hell, some of you were probably born into homes that already had a copy collecting dust in a corner.

It’s partly an audio storybook, and partly a collection of spooky sound effects. The whole thing is on YouTube, though I’d hardly call it an easy listen. As was the case with those Hallmark SFX cassettes that became popular in the ‘80s, this album was mostly meant to add ambiance to yard haunts and costume parties.

Where does Disney fit in? Well, if I can believe Wikipedia, all of the sound effects came from Walt Disney Studios. Plus, the story portions were read by Laura Olsher, who was a regular on Disney’s vinyl releases in the ‘60s.