Let’s forget our troubles with grainy videos of cheesy ‘80s commercials. Here’s the latest edition of Five Retro TV Commercials, featuring everything from robots to Skeletor to space aliens. (Times were good!)

He-Man & Quik Sweepstakes! (1980s)

Back in ’84, Nestle teamed up with Mattel for a Masters of the Universe sweepstakes, where a lucky few kids would win the entire set of He-Man toys. Contests like this were TORTURE!

This wasn’t the only time that a complete set of He-Man toys was used as promotional bait. Every time it happened, I’d lose a week to daydreams about a roomful of playsets and action figures. I’d imagine a parade of mailmen carting the presumed 50+ shipping boxes into our house and up the stairs. It was glorious.

Kids are optimistic to the point of detriment, and I never entered a contest without being 100% sure that I was gonna win. Naturally, I never did. The fantasies would then turn to nightmares, and the plastic Eternians that had so recently been my muses became mocking gods.

Bright side: If I played my cards right, I could parlay that visible misery into a trip to Toys “R” Us. Sometimes, it was easier for Mom to spend five bucks than deal with me. God, I wish I could still get rewards for crying. Read More…

As most of you know, Ecto Cooler has retired again, with the remaining stock from its summer run now being liquidated at dollar stores and discount shops. Stock up while it lasts!

But here’s something that most of you don’t know: Ecto Cooler’s termination marks the end of a Hi-C flavor that can be traced back as far as the 1960s!

Yes, long before Ecto Cooler, there was Hi-C Citrus Cooler Drink. It even had the same ghoulish green hue!

Now, was it exactly the same as Ecto Cooler? Until I find a label from a late ‘80s version of Citrus Cooler, that’s impossible to know. But there’s room for doubt.

I can confirm that Citrus Cooler was an orange/lemon blend for at least a good long while, forgoing the tangerine additive that made Ecto Cooler so distinct. Hi-C also once had a totally separate tangerine flavor, so it’s possible that our dear Ecto was a weird amalgam of those two beverages.

Still, there’s an undeniable lineage here, and it’s impossible to look at Citrus Cooler as anything but the Goldeen to Ecto Cooler’s Seaking. Read More…

Coming to you live from Dino Drac HQ, it’s Matt with a fever. And a cup of coffee. Which for some reason makes the fever feel ten times worse. Why am I drinking this?

Before I retire to the couch, lemme slide you the latest Purple Stuff Podcast. Been a while, hasn’t it?

This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit tackle twelve of our SNOWIEST and MOST WINTERY memories, covering everything from the Wampa to Freezy Freakies. It’s an eclectic but altogether ICY mix!

Give us a listen by clicking the giant, ugly play button down below!

You can also download this week’s episode by right-clicking here.

As a kid, snow days meant endless adventure and maybe even a sense of danger. In 2017, it’s just an excuse to hole up in my apartment and binge on bad television. To be honest, I think I like the adult version better. Blankets, soup and Roseanne reruns. I have simple needs. And a fever. Read More…