Without meaning to, I’ve amassed a pretty diverse collection of Freddy Krueger merchandise.

I guess the best explanation is that it’s very easy to do. Especially in his heyday, Freddy Krueger really stood apart from his slasher brethren on the merchandise front. His steady evolution into a killer comedian made him a much safer bet than, say, Michael Myers or Jason Voorhees. Freddy’s probably had ten times more toys and novelties than those two guys combined!

Since I’m more prone to notice the horror-related bric-a-brac peppering my many shelves during the Halloween season, I thought now would be a good time to give some of my “Freddy junk” a day in the sun. Here are five of my favorite – and most obscure – Krueger collectibles.

#1: Matchbox Character Car (1999)

“Character Cars” were standard-sized Matchbox cars with a twist: Each was topped with a movie figurine. The collection was surprisingly sprawling: Aside from Freddy, Jason and Leatherface, there were others based on the Universal Monsters, and even a few with non-horror characters.

Freddy was a gift from my friend Bill, and his Character Car is a beaut. In a neat nod to the films, he’s tormenting a Springwood Boiler Maintenance van. (Each car in the set was themed to match the specific figure. Jason’s version had him beating up a Crystal Lake “Camp Counselor” van, for example.)

The only downside is that you can’t remove the figure. I mean, you could, but it’d only ruin both the figure and the car. As great as it is, I think it’d be more interesting to shuffle a NOES van into a pile of regular Matchbox cars. God knows, that pile could use some personality. Read More…

Introducing GORZAK, one of the best toys you’ve never heard of.

Made by Tyco in 1994, the battery-operated behemoth stood around fifteen inches tall, feeling much like a cousin of the Inhumanoids. Here’s the commercial, but I warn you: Nobody can watch this without making the acquisition of Gorzak their life’s mission.

GOOD. GOD.

Gorzak wasn’t part of a larger collection; from all I can tell, it was just him. The figures you saw Gorzak beating up in the commercial were of the generic or “prop” sort.

That just makes the monster even better. For a one-and-done, Tyco put a LOT into this guy. A high-end commercial combining a live shoot with custom animation, and that says nothing of the toy itself. I’m of the mind that Gorzak was originally meant to be a part of some existing line, because he’s just too amazing and intricate for such a random, singular release. Read More…

This article is about GUM. New gum and old gum.

I’m grouping them together because they’re brothers from different mothers. The Big League Chew packages are new for 2013, while the mysterious “Shreds” are… well, actually, I have no idea when they’re from. 1977? 1995? All I know for sure is that they’re old enough to be poison, and recent events on Boardwalk Empire have left me fearful of rolling the dice. Read More…