2018’s Hottest Holiday Junk Food!
‘Tis the season for eating garbage and blaming the time of year, so let’s do that. Below are five of 2018’s hottest holiday junk foods. Some are new, others are just new to me.
Grinch’s Green Pancakes!
As soon as I heard about IHOP’s green pancakes, they were all I could think about. I spent weeks in a state of utter distraction, fumbling through simple tasks. Finally ordering them felt less like satisfying curiosity and more like corrective surgery.
The Grinch’s Green Pancakes — an edible promo for his new movie — will only be around for a short time. For all I know, they’ll be gone by the time you read this. The dyed pancakes are topped with a sweet cream cheese icing, which itself is topped with green whipped cream.
The pancakes were beautiful in the promo shots, but it was a different story on our table. It was as if the Grinch splooged and shat upon a moldy pancake. As someone who believes that the Whos of Whoville are True Neutral at best, I don’t why the Grinch hates me.
In fairness, I’ve seen many photos of these pancakes floating around social media, and most of them looked just like the promo shots. This was just an unlucky break, likely due to a hurried preparation at a too-busy IHOP.
GRADE: A+. Ugly as it looked, it still tasted like a birthday cupcake. Read More…
National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation!
National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation isn’t just one of my favorite Christmas movies — it’s one of my favorite movies period. It’s a film that becomes more beloved with each and every viewing, and I can say that with confidence because I’ve seen the damn thing over a hundred times.
Jay from The Sexy Armpit feels the same way, so it was only fitting that we’d dedicate an episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast to Clark’s merry misadventures.
Yep, we’re kicking off the holiday season with an hour-long tribute to Christmas Vacation, featuring everything from moose mugs to Taz mugs to Aunt Freakin’ Bethany. It’s a show we’d planned to do since our earliest Purple Stuff days!
Click here to listen to the new episode!
Thanks as always for listening, and for sharing the show around! If you missed the news, we’ve also started a Patreon page for The Purple Stuff Podcast, where you can pledge a little dough and receive access to monthly bonus shows. (The first of which will be dropping very soon!)
If you want spoilers about what’s covered in this week’s episode, here are some pics:
If you’re heading off to Parts Unknown for the holiday, have a terrific Thanksgiving and a fruitful Black Friday. I’ll be on stuffed mushrooms duty as usual!
Pringles Thanksgiving Dinner!
I was one of the lucky few who managed to snag a limited edition Pringles Thanksgiving Dinner kit. Yes, that’s a real thing that really exists.
These weird ass Pringles were only available online and sold out in minutes, even despite a midnight drop. Naturally, the $15 kits then popped up on eBay, where they’re still fetching 8-10 times that much.
Each box contains a complete Thanksgiving dinner in Pringles form. (I love how I wrote that sentence so casually, as if “Thanksgiving dinner in Pringles form” didn’t call for at least five dramatic ellipses.)
Turkey in a Can! Stuffing in a Can! Pumpkin Pie in a Can!
Each variety has an equal number of calories and roughly the same nutritional profile. I don’t know what “disodium guanylate” is — my guess would’ve been a stray lyric from Cracker’s Low — but if you eat everything shown above, you’re getting shitloads of it.
Let’s grade the beasts: Read More…
Dino Drac’s November Funpack is here!
The November Funpack is always one of my favorites to put together. It’s a chance for me to create a sort of “2nd Thanksgiving” for y’all, where the turkey is replaced with candy and the blessings are replaced with, uh, Phantom of the Opera figures.
UNITED STATES ONLY! ONLY AVAILABLE FOR 3 DAYS!
I think you know the score by now. Dino Drac’s monthly Funpacks are available on a subscription basis. It’s $25 a month (including shipping), and for as long as you remain subscribed, you’ll get a new box of old nonsense each and every month. Scroll to the bottom for ordering info!
The November 2018 Funpack is loaded with strange food, stranger collectibles and a whole lotta Snoopy. Keep reading to learn about everything that’s inside this month’s box! Read More…