Junk Food of the Gods, Part 5!
It’s been four months since the last edition of Junk Food of the Gods, which means that I’ve missed the chance to immortalize so many limited edition snacks. I’m genuinely angry about this. I want to scream.
All I can do is pick up where I left off. Down below: More junk food.
Extra Toasty Cheez-Its!
Kellogg’s claims that this was their #1 most requested Cheez-It flavor, and I believe them. Count me among the apparent millions of Cheez-It fans who get irrationally excited about the burnt ones, which belie the fact that they’re rejects by tasting so much better than the Joe Normals.
Extra Toasty Cheez-Its aren’t nearly as overcooked as many would prefer, but they’re still way browner than normal Cheez-Its, with an added flavor that really does taste like burnt cheese crackers. Not Tabasco, not liquid smoke, but actual, honest-to-goodness burnt cheese crackers. And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.
So long as these exist, I’ll only buy regular Cheez-Its under protest. Read More…
Purple Stuff: All About 1990!
1990 was a big year. A huge year! From Gremlins 2 to Dick Tracy, I’m not sure that any other year provided me with so many obsessions. Also, since I’d started junior high by the time 1990 ended, it was really my last chance to be a kid in the truest sense, free to wallow in toys, toons and bullshit without a care in the world.
…and wouldn’t you know it, this very special year is the focus of the latest Purple Stuff Podcast!
This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit run through a dozen of our favorite things about 1990, from the Ninja Turtles movie to Pepsi’s legendary Cool Cans. There’s even a whole section about an old Roy Rogers commercial, for some reason. And Monster In My Pocket, too!
(Man, 1990 really was a great year.)
Give us a listen by clicking the giant, hideous play button down below.
You can also download this week’s episode by right-clicking here.
Reminder: The Purple Stuff Podcast can also be found on iTunes, Stitcher and Podbean.
Thanks as always for listening! We thought our Ecto Cooler bonus episode would throw us off schedule, so it was nice (and fairly miraculous) to get this one uploaded on time. Hope it brings back many memories of many stupid things! Read More…
Five Random Action Figures, Part 28!
Dino Drac turned four this week. Can’t believe how fast the time went! I started the site thinking it would either be my second chance or my flat-noted swan song, and I’m proud to say that Dino Drac lasting for four years points to the former.
Hope you’ll stick around for another four! Let’s grow crazy stupid old together.
To celebrate the site’s anniversary, I thought I’d dip back into its most dependable feature. Here’s the latest edition of Five Random Action Figures, starring wrestlers, bounty hunters and supernatural garbage bugs. Enjoy.
Grizzlor
Masters of the Universe (1985)
Grizzlor was easily among the top ten Masters of the Universe figures, looking like a cross between a Tribble and a Crite. Serving as a sasquatchian foot soldier, Grizzlor was the Beast Man to Hordak’s Skeletor.
While more or less a bit player in the cartoons, Grizzlor’s action figure was too uniquely monstrous for any kid to be passive about. If we’re not counting Moss Man’s astroturf skin, Grizzlor was the only figure in the whole collection that utilized lifelike fur, which made buying him feel like buying a pet rat.
(For most kids, pet rat > action figure, but only by a little. With those powers combined, Grizzlor was hot shit.)
Interestingly, Grizzlor debuted at roughly the same time as Masters of the Universe Slime, and was actually singled out by Mattel as the one of the few figures to never trap in the Slime Pit. So of course, many of us did. You’ve heard of the Red Button theory? Its final form is the Slime Grizzlor theory.
PS: Yeah, I know. Those aren’t Grizzlor’s arms. Read More…
Purple Stuff: The Ecto Cooler Adventure.
The holiday weekend was an unending fiasco. Memorial Day marked the official return of Hi-C Ecto Cooler, and even though I’d already scored a few press samples, I needed to experience it the real way. I needed the personal shopping experience. (Also, I just wanted more goddamned Ecto Cooler.)
Unfortunately, we fans perhaps took that “May 30th” street date a little too much to heart. Seemed like everyone assumed that Ecto Cooler would just magically appear in every store at midnight, when the reality was much, much harsher: Even a day later, Ecto Cooler is still tough to find in stores, and even impossible to find depending on your location.
But we didn’t know that right away. In fact, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit embarked on a ridiculous Ecto Cooler hunt that began last Friday, and continued for practically two days straight. Our story has a happy ending, but for a while there, it was looking pretty rocky.
We decided to record our memories while they were still fresh, so hooray, you’re getting a special bonus episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast. It’s really something we wanted to record for ourselves, but I dunno, maybe you’ll enjoy listening to two guys reminisce about the night they spent hopping from one 24 hour ShopRite to another, in the middle of a giant thunderstorm.
Give us a listen by clicking the giant play button down below!
You can also download this week’s episode by right-clicking here.
I’ll let the cat out of the bag early: Yes, we did find Ecto Cooler. While the Hi-C juice boxes haven’t hit any stores within reasonable driving distance just yet, we found one Cinemark movie theater that had the cans, and decided to drive another 1.5 hours out of our way to find them. Was it worth it? Oh hell yes!
Reminder: The Purple Stuff Podcast can also be found on iTunes, Stitcher and Podbean. Read More…