Dinosaur Dracula!

Dino Drac’s July Funpack is available now!


Dino Drac’s July 2015 Funpack is available now!

This is the twelfth Funpack, which means I’ve been at this for a full year. (It also means that subscribers who’ve stuck with this from the start have also been at this for a full year. WOW.)

Suffice to say, I never expected this to go on for so long. The Funpacks began last August, out of pure need. The Halloween Countdown was approaching, and I was faced with the cold truth that I had no way of gutting through the site’s most expensive and prolific months while making zero dollars. The Funpacks were and remain a lot of extra work, but in the grand scheme of things, I felt they were the least offensive way to make a little cash from the site. I never would’ve predicted that I’d still be doing this, a year later!

It’s been a real adventure, I’ll tell you that much. Coming up with a decent mix of items for twelve months straight has taken more than a few minor miracles. Our apartment, already resigned to its eternal clutter, had to somehow make room for a constantly evolving stock of weird goodies. I’ve learned more about packing and shipping this past year than over the three previous decades.

Thanks so much to every subscriber, past and present. These have been a tremendous blessing for me. If you’ve enjoyed Dino Drac — especially Dino Drac as it’s been since last summer — know that the Funpacks are absolutely responsible for my ability to keep doing it. God knows how long I’ll be able to keep this nonsense going, but if it ever stops, it won’t be for lack of trying!

Now, what’s in store for July’s Funpack? Take a look!


There are over twelve items in this baby, covering everything from toys to cards to Kool-Aid. If you’re new to this and haven’t paid attention to my previous Funpack pitches, here’s the short version:

Every month, I mail out boxes of goodies to all subscribers. Subscriptions are $25 a month — shipping included — and handled via automatic billing through Paypal. You can cancel at any time without penalty, and no matter when you cancel, you’ll always get what you paid for. For as long as you remain subscribed, you’ll keep getting monthly Funpacks!

I’ll walk you through the ordering process at the end of this post. First, let’s talk a closer look at July’s highlights! Read More…

Five Random Action Figures, Part 20!

Welcome to the twentieth edition of Five Random Action Figures, which marks a milestone that you’ll doubtlessly see mentioned on the front pages of tomorrow’s papers.


Yes, by the end of this post, I’ll have photographed and reviewed one hundred action figures!

These articles have never been my most popular, but they’ve certainly been the most dependable, and in deference to my whole web career — nyuk nyuk — being built on piles of old toys, Five Random Action Figures will remain a part of Dinosaur Dracula for however long there is a Dinosaur Dracula.

To celebrate this HISTORIC occasion, I made sure to select five figures that could all be construed as haymakers. Enjoy!


a-2Big Boss
COPS ‘N Crooks, 1988

By the time I picked up my first COPS figure, the cartoon was already off the air, and the only place to find the toys was Lionel Kiddie City — at dramatically reduced prices, with big ugly clearance stickers all over the packages.

By then, the pickings were slim. Kiddie City had multiples of Louie and Dr. Badvibes, but almost no one else. It wasn’t until looking at the cardbacks on those “lesser” figures that I realized my folly. I should’ve been collecting this line from the very start, because BIG. BOSS. WAS. AMAZ. ING.

Look at this guy! I always favored the villains, but I especially favored the villains who looked like they ordered people around from leather thrones, eating grapes while being frond-fanned by robots.

As I’ve mentioned before, all of my “major” bad guy figures acted like mob bosses, sharing total control over everything that happened on my bedroom floor. If Boba Fett wanted to go for a spin in the Cobra BUGG, he needed to clear it with Mumm-Ra and Jabba first. If they disagreed, that red-and-black guy from Visionaries was the tiebreaker.

Big Boss, with his Kingpin build, Armani suit and Destro hand, would’ve fit right in. Oh, what could’ve been! Read More…

“Join the Nintendo Fun Club today!”


By now, I suppose most folks know that Doc Louis wasn’t kidding: The Nintendo Fun Club was a real, actual thing that happened.

Here’s the proof, and yes, I was a member:


The Nintendo Fun Club — founded in 1987 — is chiefly remembered for Nintendo Fun Club News, a tip-filled magazine that both predated Nintendo Power and directly led to its formation.

The Fun Club was free to join (at the beginning, at least), and anyone who did found instant camaraderie with all other subscribers. In grade school, those of us with Fun Club subscriptions formed a sort of secondary club of our own. We’d carry the magazines to school and wave them around during recess, as if to say, “Look, look! I’m cool for another month!”

(And we were.) Read More…

My latest flea market finds…

Once again, bad weather almost ruined the flea market. I love storms, but I really wish they’d stop focusing their efforts on Saturday mornings. Mother Nature just has no regard for me needing old Ninja Turtles.


Still, even a bad flea market will give milk if you keep squeezing its teats. The rain kept all but 20% of Englishtown’s usual vendors at home, but I wasn’t giving up until I’d filled at least four old ShopRite bags with dirty nonsense.

By the time I present my finds to you, all they really amount to are “things.” You always miss the best part. You miss the hunt.

The hunt is why I keep doing this. Well, that and the fact that there’s nothing easier to write about than flea market finds. I’m essentially a catalog copywriter, but instead of L.L. Bean jackets, I’m hocking broken action figures and the occasional Popple.

Really though, it’s all about the hunt, and that special groinal stir every time I make a successful one. Whenever I find something worth buying, it’s akin to a paleontologist digging up a tyrannosaur toe. There are worthless haystacks everywhere, but once you find that needle, hello touchdown dance.

Anyway, I got some good stuff:


Real Ghostbusters Collector’s Case!
Price: $5

SWEET, and cheap to boot! The Real Ghostbusters Collector’s Case was allegedly capable of housing one dozen RGB figures, but that was only true if you had Ray, Peter, Winston and then 9 Egons. The ghost figures — particularly those from the first wave — were far too bulky to fit right.

On the other hand, that wasn’t such a big deal. Most kids tossed the plastic trays and just jammed in as many figures as they could, sardine-style. Alternatively, we’d use them as briefcases, carting around useless piles of construction paper and swearing they were private.

Love the artwork on this one, which evokes everything from Ecto-Plazm to a parallel universe wherein Ray Stantz is sunburned and dressed like a banana. Read More…

Flea Market Finds, Volume KL-27A.

After missing a week due to other obligations, I couldn’t wait to get back to the flea market — no matter how severe the weather forecast.


Unfortunately, the rumored storms shooed away most of the outside vendors, forcing us to make do with the indoor booths. I’d been avoiding these all season long, as experience has taught me that the indoor sellers want far too much for far too little.

As things turned out, the indoor vendors weren’t so bad. Well, some were — like the guy who wanted $20 for loose Spawn figures that he identified as being “from the 1970s.” Still, with enough hunting, we were able to find a few dealers with great stuff at yard sale prices.

Check out my scores, down below!


G.I. Joe: The Movie VHS!
Price: $1!

Since I love G.I. Joe: The Movie almost as much as I love stale Red Vines, buying this was a no-brainer. Some fans are hard on the film, which “re-imagined” Cobra as having been founded by creepy monsters, and arguably dove too far into sci-fi territory for a franchise had always been — however loosely — rooted in reality.

But me? I didn’t care. Cobra Commander being spitefully transformed into a literal snake by an even bigger baddie? Incredible. The movie was weird, yes, but it was so good at being weird. Read More…