Christmas Stickers / Ugly Sweater.

There’s a big new feature up, covering fifteen treasures from the 1992 Sears Wish Book!

Golden Ninja Turtles! Crayon-shaped fish tanks! Clarinets! And more!

GO READ IT NOW!

This post only exists to draw attention to the Wish Book feature, but you know how I hate to waste space. So, take a look at my new stickers:

For $1.29, how could I turn down over a THOUSAND Christmas stickers? Sure, each is smaller than my smallest fingernail, but still…over a THOUSAND!

Let’s pretend that sales tax doesn’t exist. Let’s also pretend that there are exactly 1000 stickers in there, because brother, I ain’t counting. With those figures, the price of each sticker was $0.00129. I can’t figure out what that exactly means, but it sounds cheap.

It was the bargain of the lifetime, and I needed to put it to good use. With that in mind, let’s reintroduce one of my all-time favorite ridiculous action figures, the big fat naked guy from Karate Kommandos:

“Tabe” was one of the heroes – a sumo warrior who served as Chuck Norris’s muscle.

I understand that Tabe’s outfit is standard sumo garb, but it seems so unfair that he has to wear it all the time. With my new Christmas stickers, I can finally do something about this.

Behold, Tabe the Karate Kommando in an ugly Christmas sweater, forged from no less than a hundred tiny stickers. If you’ve seen the small fortunes made from ugly Christmas sweaters on eBay, you’d know that this is a pretty hip look.

Happy Saturday. I’m still figuring out my work schedule for the month. At this moment, it looks to be somewhere between “busy” and “oh God fuck you.” If posts appear less frequently than usual, that’s why. It may be time to bring back my BFCDAW thing. On the bright side, December is all clear, and I still fully intend to make Dino Drac’s November filled with fun things, even if I have to write them angrily at three in the morning.

I’m getting ready to go hunt for a new laptop. I want it in cobalt blue. If you want an extra method of keeping up with Dino Drac, give the site a “like” on Facebook. It’s my social networking push of the week!

  • Church

    That sweater is delightful.

  • pizzaparty

    Snowed today, lots. Pulling out the Old X-E Christmas Juke to go with this lovely feature.

  • kingklash

    Somewhere, out there, there is a sweater, or at least a Hawaiian shirt, that looks exactly like that.

  • http://thorzul.blogspot.com Thorzul

    He’s warm, and you covered up his nipples. Two birds, one stone.

  • Matt

    Apologies for the no-loading/slow-loading site, today. Sorting that out now. :)

  • Ultraman

    Nice sweater. Sumo in a Christmas sweater made of stickers=funny!

  • Regicide

    The cat hair stuck to him makes it look like he has a hairy back.

    Google-ads is displaying a banner to ugly christmas sweaters for this page. I wasn’t aware that young people would choose something so wholesome to like ironically.

  • https://www.facebook.com/Pluto.Child Pluto_Child

    Wow Google ads has hit a new low for me on this site. It’s giving me an ad for Senokot tablets.

    Love the Christmas sweater look. It also reminds me of an old article of Mystie’s. http://www.crowncombo.com/articles/2003/091503_stickers/091503.html

  • http://boardwalkangel.blogspot.com/ starwenn

    I love a creative use of Christmas stickers. I’d just put them on kids’ Christmas cards or cover really small price tags with them. ;)

  • Modok

    Matt – You may already know about this, but if not, I thought you’d get a kick out of knowing Lego is releasing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle sets next year.

    http://www.brickset.com/browse/themes/?theme=Teenage%20Mutant%20Ninja%20Turtles

  • Modok

    P.S. That’s a very fine Karate Kommando sweater.

    You could use those stickers to snazzy-up your Christmas cards or their envelopes, assuming you send them. If not, now you have a reason.

  • M. Oleman, Refugee from Dimension X

    That is one metric f*ckload of stickers. The pressure to use them all must be enormous. I don’t think I could handle that.

  • http://leatherandmetal.tumblr.com Annette

    That is one fabulous sweater.

  • http://kylesastrolounge.blogspot.com Grindhouse Cinema

    I quite like the way you are basically doing the Christmas Countdown without actually calling it that =) Whatever saves time and energy!

  • http://www.facebook.com/jaclyngibson Super Jaclyn

    So, we went to Disney a couple weeks ago, and anyone who is my friend on Facebook can see my pictures I put up! (If you’re not my friend, click my link and friend me!) It was a blast. I’ve never gone in the fall before; 1000 times better than summer. The longest we waited in line was 45 minutes and that was just us being dumb not getting fast passes.

    We also lucked out with the fast passes. On our way into Animal Kingdom, a couple was leaving and gave us theirs for Expedition Everest. That was my first time on it. It is, hands down, the BEST ride at Disney. We also were given a fast pass for the Dinosaur ride too, because people decided not to go on it.

    We went to all of the parks and then Universal/Islands of Adventure on another day. I mostly just wanted to go to Harry Potter world…SO FUN. The Hogwarts ride is a blast.

    As for the All Star Movies..I get that it’s a “value” resort, but never staying there again. The bus system is AWFUL.

  • http://http://thegoldweredigging.blogspot.com/ FangsFirst

    I saw the sweater and first thought you inducted him into the Yakuza.

  • Modok

    You know, it’s been about 15 years since Animal Kingdom opened and still, the first thing I think of when I hear the name is how they accidentally killed some of their animals in the park’s early days. For instance, a couple rare birds were run over by a safari tram, and some others animals died from drinking antifreeze.

    Apparently, a bunch more died in 2009 en route to the park, including two otters who ate toxic seeds: “Disney said the seeds were toxic but that handlers thought the otters wouldn’t eat them.” Lovely. http://www.cbsnews.com/2100-870_162-9412.html

  • Trekkie313

    There is a Toys R’ Us express at my local mall, they want $7.99 for a damn Crayon Bank. I have 4 Crayon Banks and didn’t pay more than $1 per each!

  • http://facebook.com/hemadrone Jugendsehnsucht

    I swear, if someone had just randomly told me “Hey, look at this! Some weirdo just made an X-mas sweater for an action figure out of a hundred holiday stickers!” (as people are so frequently wont to do, of course), my very first response would be “It was Matt, wasn’t it?”. This is just so… overwhelmingly you, and I love it.

    If you want to bring back BFCDAW for the duration of your November from Hell, I’m all for it; those last ones were great. Something about being forced to deal with all the restraints of the situation really brought out the creativity, and I couldn’t stop laughing at the thought of you doing that sort of stuff at work while desperately trying not to get caught and have someone ask you to explain what was going on.

  • http://adventcalendar.decemberized.com/ Dann

    I feel like his expression changed to a sort of resigned defeat once the stickers were on him.

  • http://FaceBook.com/Calavera.candy Candy

    My god you’re clever, Matt!

  • http://traveling-pics.livejournal.com/ Traveling Pics

    The stickers really made a cool sweater for Naked Tabe, I like the concept :D

  • SuperJ

    Holy crap, that sweater was one of the funniest things I have seen in a while. I might have to make it my Facebook photo (with your permission, of course).