The Halloween season is a time for frights, yes, but it’s also a time for frivolities. At least, that’s what I need to say when I’m about to hock boxes of spooky nonsense.
Available in the United States only!
Dino Drac’s September Funpack is (finally) here!
If you don’t know the drill, I run a monthly subscription box service. For as long as you stay subscribed, you’ll keep receiving new boxes of mostly-old collectibles and assorted fun stuff! The boxes are $25 a month (including shipping), and you can cancel at any time without penalty.
The Funpacks are of critical importance during this time of year, when I’m not only putting out more content, but spending much more money to do so. Remember, this is site’s only true revenue stream! The meager ads I run don’t even come close to covering Dino Drac’s assorted costs. So on top of getting neat boxes of weird stuff every month, you’re also helping to ensure that I can keep doing this strange thing!
The Spooky September Funpack is loaded with more than a dozen items, ranging from ancient collectibles to brand new novelties, snacks, an exclusive essay, artwork and more!
If that image alone is all you need to see, scroll to the bottom for ordering info. Otherwise, keep reading to learn about EVERYTHING you’ll receive in this month’s box! Read More…
Remember the opening scene of 1988’s Child’s Play?
Detective Mike Norris (Chris Sarandon) chases serial killer Charles Lee Ray (Brad Dourif) into a toy store. Nearing death, Ray uses a voodoo spell to transfer his soul into a doll, signaling the start of a cheeky slasher series that’s still going strong in 2017.
But let’s back up for a second, because we HAVE to talk about that toy store…
As I understand it, “Playland Toys” was in reality a dead Chinese restaurant. Where a lesser movie would have stuffed the shelves with generic junk, the fake toy store in Child’s Play was absolutely loaded with legit ‘80s toys.
I’ve watched this scene a billion times and I’m always discovering new things, from Dizzy Dizzy Dinosaur to giant G.I. Joe vehicles. I don’t know exactly when this sequence was shot, but judging by the toys, my best guess is 1987.
Some of the goodies are easy to spot. Others only reveal themselves when you pause on a precise frame. All in all, for nostalgia purposes, the scene is worth as much as in-store footage from a 1987 Toys “R” Us.
Below are five of the coolest items spotted in Playland Toys: Read More…
We judge each Halloween season on the strength of its junk food. That’s just how we roll. Lots of interesting new candies? Great season. Nothing worth taking pictures of in Target? Bad season.
Below are five of this year’s hottest Halloween junk foods. (And keep in mind, I’ve already purchased enough sugary garbage to add two more chapters to this series.)
Pillsbury Grands Pumpkin Spice Rolls!
Found at: ShopRite
These actually debuted in 2015, but I never had access to them before this year.
Pillsbury Grands Pumpkin Spice Rolls are autumnal spins on cinnamon rolls. A less valiant effort would’ve limited the fall flavor to the icing, but here it’s also in the dough, which is orangey in color and distinctly “pumpkin spicy” in flavor.
They’re ridiculously good, and ridiculously LARGE. I can’t believe that the rolls are “only” 300 calories, since each one is practically the size of a baseball glove. They look like giant land crabs and you need five hands to eat them properly.
GRADE: A+. I can’t think of another make-at-home Halloween treat that’s this decadent. There’s also the matter of the smell, which is capable of making you “float to the pie” like you’re in an old Goofy cartoon. Read More…
Happy Friday! Here’s a new podcast to kick off the weekend. It’s about Halloween doughnuts!
We know we’d promised a regular full-length episode this week, but we had to shift gears to make room for today’s once-a-year opportunity. For whatever reason, Krispy Kreme chose today and today ALONE to sell pumpkin spice versions of their classic glazed doughnuts, and there was no chance in hell that we were gonna miss out on those.
…and so, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit (who is currently off working on his latest Halloween special) were on the road before six in the goddamned morning to hunt down doughnuts. Our mission was a success. To find out how they tasted, give the show a listen:
(We also talk about the new movie It, which we saw last night. Tl;dr: It was awesome.) Read More…
The return of the Halloween Countdown means that I get to dust off one of my favorite recurring Dino Drac features: Classic Creepy Commercials!
Since I’ve now covered well over 100 spooky commercials, the pickings are slim and I’ll need to get creative. So like, my apologies to those offended by me pitching a sneaker commercial as “creepy” just because it makes liberal use of fake fog.
Tales from the Darkside WPIX Promo! (1986)
By now you must realize that I will never shut up about Tales from the Darkside, my favorite horror anthology series.
I’ve mostly given up on trying to turn TFTD virgins into fans, since the show will never hit as hard if you didn’t grow up on it. For maximum effect, you need those childhood memories of lying awake past your bedtime and enduring that creepy theme as a sort of wicked lullaby.
This promo is extra special to me, since I used to watch Tales from the Darkside on WPIX in that exact 11PM time slot. (Maybe not in 1986, but certainly a few years later.) Read More…
I wasn’t expecting to finish this tonight, but thank God I did, because the idea of having to sell a Madd Matt video early in the morning was making me sick.
In MM’s second video for the 2017 Halloween season, he’s reviewing another bag of random Halloween junk. Seems like that’s all he ever does anymore.
It’s an insane mix of vintage items and cool new stuff. I think there may even be a brief cameo by Little Debbie’s Pumpkin Delights. Down below are some teasers:
I’ve taken two showers and my eyes are still black.
I suffer for you, always.