Dino Drac’s July Funpack is here!

Okay guys, I’m finally ready to show you Dino Drac’s July Funpack! It’s pretty sizzling, IMO. Take a look!

A beautiful bevy of vintage collectibles, plus a big wad of bubble gum. You couldn’t ask for more.

Here’s the deal. Subscriptions are currently closed, and all subscriber boxes have already shipped. I have a handful of spares left that I can sell to anyone who is interested. As always, the cost is $25, and that includes shipping to anywhere in the United States. Zip to the bottom to order one, or keep reading to learn about everything in this month’s box!

Let’s kick things off with a very big swing. You’ll each receive one of these Officer Big Mac “Fast Macs” cars, released by McDonald’s back in 1984!

Those Fast Macs were some of my favorite McDonald’s toys as a kid. They’re little pullback cars that speed off on their own. Different cars had different McDonaldland characters, but for this Funpack, you’re all taking a bite out of crime with the big man himself, Officer Big Mac!

Each toy is still trapped on its original blister card, and for a cool twist, these are from their limited test-market release back in 1984. (The toys returned in 1985 for a national campaign.) So, on top of just being generally cool in every which way, your Fast Mac will arrive in extra-rare packaging!

The toys are all untouched, obviously. Package condition is generally very good, but you can perhaps expect some minor wear and yellowed bubbles. Overall, for McDonald’s toys from over forty years ago, they’re in fabulous condition, and I’m carefully packing the boxes to ensure that they’ll arrive in tip top shape!

Next up, you’ll each receive a Disney Villains “Chibi in Motion” blind box, each containing one of seven different Disney “fiends,” represented as little figurines with shaky limbs. Each has an attached clip, so I guess the idea is that you can attach them to bookbags or whatever.

These are modern toys, no more than a few years old, but they’re definitely out of production now. The possible characters include Cruella, the Evil Queen, Scar, Ursula, Hades, Maleficent, and then a rare iridescent version of Maleficent. I have no way of knowing which one you’ll receive, but all seven are in play!

Then we have this very vintage Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles patch. Featuring Raphael, these were sold in the late ‘80s, individually-packaged at a not-cheap price. Unlike some of the other patches I’ve been including in recent Funpacks, this is a really high-quality embroidered patch — whatever that means — large and in charge.

The patches are all totally unused and totally clean, with the whites still white and the greens still green.

You’ll also get one of these sealed packs of Hubba Bubba Bubble Tape! Back in my day, each included six feet of bubble gum. I’m not sure if they’re still packing quite that much, but there is a lot of gum in these babies.

There are three flavors in the mix, and you’ll get one of them at random: Awesome Original, Sour Blue Raspberry, or Tangy Tropical. No matter which one you pull, you can count on a good long sugar rush.

And there’s still more! I’m tossing y’all a nice pair of vintage trading card packs, including Superman III from 1983, and Russ Trolls from 1992.

(While Superman might seem to be the top dog, the truth is that those Russ Trolls cards aren’t always easy to find. I’ve been trying to work them into a Funpack for years!)

Rounding things out, we have this merry max of art and reading material, including this month’s 5×7” cardstock mini-poster, featuring a stack of classic fruit snacks from the late ‘80s. That’s joined by this month’s 2×2” sticker, featuring that “Goblin Time” guy from the meme that the internet will never credit me for originating. (I swear, I did.)

You’ll also get this month’s Funpack Newsletter, plus an exclusive essay that will never be reprinted on the site. This month’s essay is about my experience watching Woodstock ‘94 on PPV, which sounds like a weird thing to write an essay about, but I think we can all agree that I’m a weird guy.

So yep, you’ll get everything shown above, for $25, and that includes shipping to anywhere in the United States! (I can only ship to the States, sorry!)

If you’re already a subscriber and you’d like to stay that way, do nothing! You’re all set, and your Funpack is already on its way

If you’re NOT a subscriber but still want this box, you can purchase one by clicking the link below. Very limited supply, and once they’re gone, they’re gone forever!

Thanks so much! All orders will be shipped within 24 hours of payment. Next month begins Dino Drac’s annual three-month run of Halloween-themed Funpacks, so stay tuned, the party’s just getting started.