Welcome to December! Like clockwork, the minor draft from the window I sit beside — endurable through most of the year — now has my right hand feeling like the discarded prisoner from Star Trek VI’s snow jail sequence.

Most of the ads in this edition of Classic Christmas Commercials are from the mid ‘90s. I was still a kid by then, but only barely, and I counted on the Christmas season to really let me feel like one. Looking back at stuff from that era hits differently. It’s not wistful nostalgia as much as archaeological analysis. I figure myself out through old Velveeta commercials.

Gremlins on WPIX! (1993)

In November of ‘93, my beloved WPIX ran Gremlins in prime time. I’ll spare you another mile-long explanation of WPIX, but in summary, it was like the broadcast version of the USA Network — a place for cartoons, sitcom reruns, and movies that ruled your world five years prior.

I shouldn’t need to argue that Gremlins is a Christmas movie, because of course it is. The furry protagonist was a Christmas present, after all.

That was one of the first films I requested when my family discovered the “connect two VCRs to copy video rentals” trick, so I hardly “needed” to watch WPIX’s ‘93 broadcast. I’m sure I did, though, because it meant that strangers were watching it at the same time. That’s still cool in 2020, but before the internet, the connectivity factor was off the charts. Read More…

The holiday season is all about traditions, and one of mine is naming the best toys from old department store catalogs. Let’s head back to 1992, when the 47th and 48th hottest things going were Swans Crossing and 3 Ninjas.

Behold, JCPenney’s 1992 Christmas catalog! Over 500 pages’ worth of things you had to have, from Little Mermaid dolls to those cheap artist kits that came with the messy pastels.

I meticulously examined the entire catalog, and then almost as meticulously cut key pages out of it. What, you thought I scanned these pages without tearing them out of the catalog first? Excuse me, have you tried to scan bound pages from a 550-page catalog? They look like Edvard Munch paintings.

Below are six highlights from JCPenney’s 1992 Christmas catalog. Narrowly missing the cut are a 90210 sleeping bag and a Camaro-shaped phone.

Batcave & Ertl Die-cast Set!
($44.99 & $14.99)

Batman Returns hit theaters in June of that year, which gave its toys the advantage of recency. With TMNT waning and no other strong contenders, Batman ruled over the Christmas season with ease.

The crème de la crème was Kenner’s Batcave Command Center, which strongly resembled a modern day Cheesecake Factory. Sorry, you know it’s true. I think Bruce would’ve ordered the pretzel bite fondue.

Actually, I’m more enamored by those die-cast metal figures and vehicles, from Ertl. I used to buy those all the time, if only because they were some of the cheapest figures in toy stores — especially after the clearance sales started. Hell, sometimes I’d throw a tiny metal Batman on the counter just to break a ten. Read More…

Happy Thanksgiving week, everyone! The festivities may be muted this year, but you can still depend on a few of the usual traditions — like, say, the Purple Stuff Podcast’s annual review of an old Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade!

This year, me and Jay from Sludge Central have selected the *2001* parade. I know that seems like an oddly “recent” choice for us, but that year’s parade was a banger. With appearances by everyone from Cheesasaurus Rex to Tim Curry, we absolutely needed to gush about this!

Click here to listen to this week’s show!

Oh, and if you want to watch the 2001 parade, the awesome MajorLeaguePongGods has uploaded the entire thing to YouTube. It’s a little choppy, but you’ll get the drift.

Some of the other special guests included Pikachu, Triple H, Cookie Monster and Kenny G. For extra historical value, the 2001 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade took place fairly soon after 9/11, which was definitely an “affecting element” in how everything was produced.

As a reminder, the Purple Stuff Podcast is also on Patreon, where you can grab an exclusive bonus show each and every month. (November’s is coming soon, and yep, it’ll be holiday-themed!)

Down below are several grainy images from the 2001 parade, if you want some warning about what this episode’s gonna tackle! Read More…