Classic Creepy Commercials, Volume 20!
Get set for the best edition of Classic Creepy Commercials yet. I’m serious. I’m Babe Ruthing this mofo.
All of these ads were rescued from taped-off-television compilations. For maximum effect, imagine them sandwiched between seven-minute stretches of DuckTales and Scooby-Doo. You were wearing Skidz and eating Tato Skins, and you hoped that nobody could see you.
Local Haunted House! (1990)
Whenever I write about old TV commercials, there’s a percentage of you who take my word on things and never actually play them. PLEASE, PLEASE DON’T DO THAT WITH THIS ONE.
From El Paso, Texas — Halloween capital of the world — it’s Junior Woman’s Haunted House Spectacular! From what I can tell, this was some sort of local, low-fi Halloween event where kids could meet Dracula and other costumed creeps.
That such a thing even had a TV commercial is amazing enough, but the fact that they pitched Junior Woman’s Haunted House Spectacular with a custom rap makes watching this the best possible use of 30 seconds.
It’s oh-so-imitable, and the replay value is through the roof. I encoded this six months ago, and I’ve seriously watched it more than 200 times. It’s become my go-to medicine for whenever things are bad.
Best part: The music was added in post, which explains why every one of those three dozen kids appeared to be dancing to a different song. Read More…
Halloween Finds from an old Party Store!
We visited a random party store in Jersey, and guys, this place was a goldmine. Looked like it hadn’t been renovated since 1992.
The layout of their mask section was SO old school. Taking that as a hint, I dug deeper and found tons of vintage Halloween thingies hiding in the aisles.
Take a tour of the store and see what I picked up in tonight’s video:
Some of the best parts of Halloween are hiding in the shadows. Once you get done with your Target and Walmart and Spirit Halloween runs, make sure you look for places like this. It’s where yesteryear’s Halloween junk lives forever!
…heck, you might just go home with “Horror Nails” and the world’s worst Jason mask.
Thanks for watching the vid, and have a great weekend!
Dino Drac’s Spooky September Funpack!
IT IS HERE, guys. Time to unveil the super spooky September Funpack!
UNITED STATES ONLY! LIMITED TIME! LIMITED SUPPLY!
I’m extremely happy with how this month’s box came out, and I think you will be, too. It’s the Halloween Countdown around these parts, so naturally, the September Funpack is 100% Halloween-themed, with around a dozen haunted/awesome items.
I’m sure you know the deal by now. Without these Funpacks, there’d be no Dino Drac. Your patronage is extra important at this time of year, when the site is at its busiest and most expensive. Subscriptions are $25 a month (including shipping), and for as long as you remain subscribed, you’ll keep getting boxes and old-and-new goodies every single month!
The September Funpacks have historically sold out quickly, and once these are gone, they’re gone forever. Act quick if ya want in!
Scroll to the bottom for ordering info, or keep reading to see EVERYTHING you’ll get in this month’s Funpack! Read More…
Purple Stuff tackles HALLOWEEN!
If the new Halloween film has reignited your passion for the franchise at large, we’ve got the perfect hour-killer for you:
In this brand new episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit are proud to present our MICHAEL MYERS MISHMASH — ten weird and awesome things that somehow tie into the Halloween franchise.
We’re not just talking about the movies, here. The show covers everything from toys to posters to books to video games. It’s pretty much a straight shot of deep cuts. Maybe you’ll learn something new!
This might end up being our biggest show of the season, so we hope you enjoy it!
Click here to hear the new episode!
You can also find The Purple Stuff Podcast on iTunes, Stitcher and all of those other places that I can never be bothered to link. Look us up, and thanks as always for sharing the show around! Without you doing that, we’d never grow!
Oh, and if I might make a recommendation, tonight’s episode pairs wonderfully with a big pile of Halloween candy. Treat yourselves, guys. After all, we only get to be really happy for two months a year!