Dinosaur Dracula!

Matt Madd 2017: Halloween Junk Bag #3!

Today was an all-in-one video day, so I am now deliriously tired and a sworn enemy of proper sentence structure.

On the bright side… mission accomplished! Here’s the latest Madd Matt video:

Madd Matt’s third bag of random Halloween junk for the 2017 season includes everything from a “spider larva ball” to an adorably tiny pumpkin pail. Watch it above, or in a scary larger size on YouTube.

My next orders of business involve blanket forts and “Do Not Disturb” signs and hopefully a secret cache of fun-sized NutRageous bars.

Thanks for watching the video! Read More…

Grimace from McDonald’s used to be evil.

Y’all remember Grimace, right?

The purple dude, I mean. Ronald McDonald’s de facto best friend.

Throughout my childhood, Grimace was constantly on television, making commercial breaks tolerable with his adorably dopey demeanor and never-say-never attitude. (I’ll remind you that he once caught a literal freakin’ star to give to Ronald for Christmas.)

He was probably the most “purely sweet” character on TV at the time, which is what makes this next part so interesting:

Grimace used to be a VILLAIN.

Yup!

Originally, Grimace was known as The Evil Grimace, a milkshake-stealing monster with four arms and a bad attitude!

That version of the character debuted in 1971, and spent several years as Ronald’s foil. This was all well before my time, and I gotta tell ya, seeing an extra-armed dickhead version of Grimace would’ve totally blown my mind as a kid.

The Evil Grimace even starred in several McDonald’s commercials during the 1970s. Three are collected below: Read More…

Spooky Songs for your Halloween Playlist!

It might not feel like it, but it’s the first day of autumn!

Nobody can deny that we’re in the Halloween season now. If you were holding off on taping up cardboard skulls or transforming into a bat or whatever, now is the time!

To help ring in the best season of the year, we’re back with a brand new full-length episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast. This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit add the latest chapter to our Spooky Songs series.

In Spooky Songs IV, we’ll boost your Halloween playlist with a dozen oddball picks, ranging from horrific pop songs to pro-wrestling entrance themes. We did a pretty deep dig on this one!

Give us a listen by clicking the giant, ugly play button down below:

You can also download this week’s episode by right-clicking here.

Thanks so much for listening and for sharing the show around! Without you, there’d be no us! Read More…

2017’s Best Halloween Junk Food, Part 2!

I’m back with more of this year’s hottest Halloween junk food. Some are new for 2017, others are just new to Dino Drac.

If you missed Part 1, start there!

Since three of these are pumpkin spice-related, I’ll admit that my prediction about last year being THE last year for the pumpkin spice craze was way off

(Alternatively, I could go back and edit old articles until I’m correct. I might.)


Pumpkin Spice Gouda Cheese!
Found at: Stop & Shop

The weirdest thing about pumpkin spice cheese is that it’s… pretty good? This was one of the few times I’ve dealt with a pumpkin spice food that wasn’t either “too strange” or “just cinnamon.”

The flavor didn’t seem much different from plain Gouda at first, but then came the subtle yet unmistakable pumpkin spice aftertaste. You kinda have to chew the cheese to get to it, which is only unreasonable if you’re the type who swallows cheese whole. Frrrreak.

It’s basically Gouda cheese with a hint of nutmeg, neither too spicy nor too sweet to disqualify it from everyday Gouda purposes. Whatever they may be.

GRADE: A. I just love the idea of an official autumn cheese. The flavor was a nice surprise, but the mere fact that I can celebrate Halloween by buying cheese was worth an “A” no matter what. Read More…

Classic Creepy Commercials, Volume 17!

Get set for another batch of Classic Creepy Commercials, featuring everything from horror movies to space aliens to bugs made out of Play-Doh. We’re gonna have a time!

The Official Boglins Hotline! (1988)

Yep, this was a real thing that really happened. An official Boglins hotline!

As I’ve mentioned before, 1988 must’ve been THE biggest year for kid-targeted 900 numbers. It seemed like virtually every person or thing that kids were even mildly interested in had one.

This commercial was low-fi in the best ways. Though the Boglins brand was owned by Mattel, this was clearly not Mattel’s work. (Part of the ad’s charm is knowing how easily one could do a frame-by-frame recreation with a couple of toys and a goofy voice. And hey, I’m free on Saturday.)

You’ll notice that each caller could score a complimentary hologram card, though I assume that only callers willing to listen to fifteen minutes’ worth of Boglins gibberish ever learned how. Read More…

Pepsi Halloween Cola: Video Taste Test!

What was that old Jean Grey quote? Something about evolution leaping forward every few hundred millennia? Keep it in mind.

PEPSI HALLOWEEN COLA. Yes, this is a real thing.

Unfortunately, as of now, it’s only a thing that exists in Japan. I spent way too much money importing the stuff so I could be one of the very first filthy Americans to taste hot pink Halloween soda.

Special occasions call for special measures, so for the first time in years, here’s a video of me without the white face paint:

Like I say in the video, Pepsi Halloween Cola basically tastes like strawberry candy, though I have no idea if that’s what it’s supposed to taste like. I mean, does it matter? It’s ungodly pink soda with a cool-as-heck Halloween label. I need no more. Read More…