The Mostly-Complete Dino Drac Archives.

Edible Stocking Stuffers!

I bought a big pile of edible stocking stuffers. Most of you would probably avoid these, whether because they’re made of dried meat or because they’re actually meant for cats. Me? I don’t discriminate. I love all stocking stuffers. Here are 70-100 words about each.

Thanksgiving is fantastic.

Well, Thanksgiving kicked off with huge news. I’m sitting there watching a giant Kool-Aid Man roll by, and what does Matt Lauer announce? THE PENDING RETURN OF SHARKLEBERRY FIN. Oh my GOD. YESSSS! I’ll have more to say about this fantastic news later. This post is just meant to be

Dino Drac’s “Big Boxes of Joy” for sale!

[stextbox id=”alert”]UPDATE: The Big Boxes of Joy sold out in record time. Thanks, all! Still have some Merry Mini Funpacks left — see below! For those dying for a Box of Joy, I’ll see if I have enough replacements to cover a few extras later this week. E-mail me if

I won a giant gingerbread house.

…that’s the short version. I won a giant gingerbread house. It’s huge, it’s delicate, and it smells so sincere. Good God, the smell! Glade might try to make it into an aerosol mist, but only the genuine articles smell like this. I won it from that Christmas fair. The one I’ve bee

That cheese with the nuts around it.

No Christmas season is complete without THAT CHEESE. I don’t know if there’s an official term for it. They’re essentially hockey pucks made of cheese, rimmed with crushed almonds. I cannot remember a Christmas Eve without them. They sometimes appeared during Thanksgiving or even the

TMNT “Capture the Kraang” Game!

Right, like I was going to pass this up. “Capture the Kraang” is a clever spin on the old game where you use a little rod to yank fake fish out of a plastic pool. As the title suggests, they’ve replaced the fish with eight goddamned snapping Kraang.

Holiday Goldfish Crackers x1000.

If “Christmas” and “Pepperidge Farm Goldfish” both rank high on the list of things you adore, you are so unbelievably covered. We’ve seen Christmassy Goldfish before, but never this many at the same time. The only reasonable inference is that Pepperidge Farm Goldfish is the offic

Bud Light Lime’s “Cran-Brrr-Rita!”

I’m on a big project this week, which is eating my time and making me crazy, but at least temporarily funding my passion for cranberry-infused alcoholic beverages. SPEAKING OF WHICH… Today’s video is my review of Bud Light Lime’s “Cran-Brrr-Rita.” The margarita with a twist! Th

Capri Sun’s Jingle Berry Holiday Pack!

This year’s run of holiday junk food looks to be pretty fantastic. I’ve already spotted many great things, and not just repeats from last year, either. I’m talking about all NEW things. Leading the way is a special box of Christmassy Capri Sun! Capri Sun’s “Limited Time Holiday P

The Trash Pack Advent Calendar!

I took a few days to lose the post-Halloween doldrums, but now I’m back, and ready to talk about candy canes. Almost. Dino Drac’s 2013 Holiday Season has arrived, and with it, another swank logo courtesy of Jason Week. We’ll come up with something else for December, but a “Thanksgi

Shrunken Apple Head’s 10th Birthday!

Oof. This one’s gonna be bittersweet for me. I’ll tell you why in a minute. Guys, it’s Shrunken Apple Head’s TENTH birthday! Shrunken Apple Head first appeared on X-Entertainment in 2003, as part of my ill-fated attempt to review an ancient Vincent Price “Shrunken Head” kit wit

Happy Halloween!

Holy shit, it’s Halloween. Finally? Already?! The 2013 Halloween Countdown isn’t over yet (COME BACK TONIGHT!), but I hope you enjoyed it. More importantly, I hope you enjoyed the whole damn season. I know I have. Usually, Halloween gets here, and there’s a tiny voice inside me screa

Horror Spitballs, from 1989!

The rumors are true. I have eight balls. Made by Entertech in 1989, the SPITBALLS collection turned our favorite slashers, monsters and ghosts into… well, spitballs. Each set came with two hollow rubber heads, with pinholes in the mouths. Squeeze ‘em underwater to fill ‘em up, and sq

Rocks & Bugs & Things!

Rocks & Bugs & Things may very well be the strangest toy line of all time. Made by Ideal in 1985, there was nothing typical about these “hungry hunters with hidden horrors.” This much should be obvious just by looking at the box. No, your eyes aren’t playing tricks on you. No

Classic Creepy Commercials – Volume 3!

I’ve been absent for a few days, owing to several minor things that snowballed at the WORST POSSIBLE TIME. The assumption is that life went on without those three or four extra posts about candy and costumes. In any event, now I’m back, and I have more Classic Creepy Commercials! Here�

Vintage Vending #18: Rotting Vermin!

Okay, this has gotta be the weirdest edition of Vintage Vending yet. LOOK AT THIS THING! No formal title for the collection was provided, I guess because “Bugs & Fish Guts” would’ve been more polarizing than fetching. Everything about it is off. I’ll describe the indivi

Preserving the Monster Cereals.

After spending half of August gushing over Monster Cereals, I deliberately took a break from covering them – even as those swank retro boxes started piling up at Target. Please don’t confuse my silence with dispassion. I bought those fuckers in bulk the second I saw them. Even over a m

Halloween Pancakes!

Halloween is JUST TOO CLOSE. Since it falls on a Thursday, I can’t shake the feeling that everything will putter out like the last season of Heroes. For all intents, Halloween is this weekend, and that is JUST TOO CLOSE. So I’m sort of just grabbing at everything now, determined to do

Classic Creepy Commercials – Volume 2!

With another assist from Larry P., here’s the next batch of Classic Creepy Commercials! (You’ve read Volume 1, right?) Exactly zero of these have any clear link to the Halloween season, and yet, all of them are undeniably Halloweeny. If you’re in need of a late October sp

Madd Matt reviews SPIDER BITES candy, from 1990.

Madd Matt sure spent a long time making this video! Never heard of Spider Bites? Made by Topps in 1990, it was a collection of ghoulish spider figurines that dispensed awful, colorful candy. They came in a really great box! Thank you.