Christmas 2017

I drew pictures representing five Christmas memories, and then wrote about them. I’m super good at never going viral. Just to get this out of the way: Yes I draw like I’m five and no it’s not for effect. Underneath the Christmas Tree! I used to love laying under the Christmas tree. I

I wanted to sneak one last edition of Classic Christmas Commercials onto Dino Drac before THE BIG DAY, which is now approaching so rapidly that it might actually be January by the time I finish this paragraph. Below: Five more Christmas commercials from 1987, featuring ALF, Garfield and S

Well, it’s that time again. Time to make the weird old appetizers. I grew up surrounded by recipe books that were published many years before I was born. They fascinated me as a kid, and they still do now. Not every dish is appetizing, but there was such a colorfully crude artistry to it

A reader donated over seven hours’ worth of Christmas specials, all taped off television back in 1987… with every commercial left intact. Yes! (Thank you, Robin!) Everything in this edition of Classic Christmas Commercials is from that tape, so imagine them breaking Rudolph and Frosty�

Below: Five of this year’s hottest holiday junk foods, from punny M&M’s to THE BEST POSSIBLE SLURPEE. Nutmeg & Cinnamon Triscuit! I love Triscuits but I hate writing about them, because deep down I know that you shouldn’t pluralize them that way. If I want to refer to sev

Here’s a collection of ancient newspaper ads, all with a Christmas flavor. May they fill you with nostalgia and joy and maybe Swiss Miss. Candy Canes and Ninja Turtles! (1991) Family Dollar was hardly the first place gift-givers would’ve hit while hunting for TMNT figures, but even the

Y’all remember the time McDonald’s pitched Chicken McNuggets as actual literal Christmas presents, right? In 1987, McDonald’s unveiled Holiday Chicken McNuggets, which came in awesomely complicated packages that looked (and even opened like) gift boxes. It wasn’t McD’s only push

I love Christmas songs. Even the bad ones. They make me feel happy even when I’m not. They turn drives to department stores into scenes out of family movies. They make coffee taste better and $3 candles smell sweeter. Jay from The Sexy Armpit feels the same way, so we’re thrilled to de

Today’s video covers my Christmas shopping spree at Dollar Tree: Dollar Tree’s assortment of Xmas decorations and novelties is… interesting. During Halloween, they can get away with anything, since spooky stuff only seems to improve with cheapness and cheese. Christmas junk, on the o

It wouldn’t be the holiday season without piles of ridiculous junk food to obsess over: Take this, for example. PEPSI CHRISTMAS COLA. It’s pretty much a direct sequel to Pepsi Halloween Cola, right down to the sad fact that you’ll need to import it from Japan and spend way more on sh

Here’s my recipe for stuffed mushrooms, which has gotten a surprising number of requests. Like at least three. I make these for Thanksgiving and Christmas every year, because my habits are my comforts and if you fuck with them you die. (And also because it’s one of the few dishes my fa

I’ve curated another batch of ancient Christmas commercials. Keep reading if you enjoy Chicken McNuggets, Chex Mix and copper top battery testers. Don’t if you don’t. McDonald’s: Scrooge’s Christmas! (1984) Ebenezer Scrooge is so giddy over Chicken McNuggets that he drops

It’s been a blink-and-you’ll miss-it holiday season so far. Thanksgiving is in less than a week and Christmas is barely more than a month away. I can’t stand it. Maybe I’ve been spoiled by those three month Halloween celebrations, because I feel like I don’t even have time to lis

If you correlate the holiday season with frivolous spending, BOY do I have the thing for you. Get a load of Dino Drac’s November Funpack! (U.S. ONLY. AVAILABLE FOR A LIMITED TIME!) Vintage collectibles, fun toys and a whole Thanksgiving dinner, all in one box! If you don’t know the dea

The arrival of a new holiday season means more ancient toy catalog reviews on Dino Drac. Yay! Shown above is the 1994 edition of Toys “R” Us’s Big Toy Book. By then, the Big Toy Book was far and away the most important holiday catalog out there, taking the top spot from the Sears Wis

I’ve been quietly surveying all of the new-for-2017 holiday junk foods, and man, there sure are a lot of them. Good ones, too! Even if you’re not into the red-and-green season, I hope you can at least appreciate the fun garbage you’re gonna get to eat. Take these monsters, for exampl