Wallet-Sized George Photos.
Got some mail today! <3
Mail from Snapfish. If you’ve been paying any attention to Dino Drac, you know what this is. And I couldn’t be more excited.
Four bucks and four days later, I have wallet-sized photos of George the Gremlin.
I asked you to choose the better option, but I cheated and ordered photos for both. For what it’s worth, the set on the right, with the weird red paper background, ended up winning the poll.
I just couldn’t bring myself to pick one over the other. I have no kids, but I have so many surrogates.
Course, this was all pretty pointless. My mangled wallet has been without its little plastic photo album thing for years now.
I DON’T CARE. I’ll just shove my Georgies into the pockets, like credit cards. Someday, I’ll be out buying socks, and I’ll accidentally hand one over to the cashier. She’ll laugh. We’ll become fast friends.
The George photos are in good company. My wallet’s starring crew includes:
1. A pile of around 20 MetroCards, which may or may not have any money left on them. No idea how you guys use the buses where you live, but this is how we do it here. MetroCards. Flimsy, expensive MetroCards that aren’t assigned in denominations that equate to any exact number of bus rides. Some of these will have enough for 80% of one ride. Some may have enough for 2.5 rides. I’ll never know, because any opportunity to check their balances would mean getting home from work late, and I’d rather have an extra 15 minutes to watch George Lopez than capitalize on the 200 bucks’ worth of bus fares hiding on these horrible cards.
2. An old Pepsi phone card with Amy from Congo on it.
I mentioned trying to buy socks with a George photo. Well, one time, I tried to dip Amy the Gorilla into my bus’s MetroCard slot. Thank God the driver would’ve preferred drinking tar to acknowledging my presence.
There’s just no good way to explain why I carry a defunct phone card with Amy on it.
I’m almost okay with being pickpocketed, just so I can imagine the asshole’s reaction as he thumbs through a hundred MetroCards, Amy from Congo, and two wallet-sized photos of Gremlins action figures.
This was the highlight of my day. I regret nothing.
