Dinosaur Dracula!

The Mostly-Complete Dino Drac Archives.

You have some reading to do!

Below are most of the Dino Drac blog archives. Certain categories may be excluded to keep things tidier. If you notice any typos, pretend you didn’t.

  • Five Random Action Figures, Part 45!

    I haven’t published a new edition of Five Random Action Figures since last June, because the remaining bits of my collection are stuffed into storage bins so extremely buried that I’d have to tear this whole place apart to get at ‘em. Luckily, life threw me a bone: As part of our pre

  • 5 Ridiculous Movie-Themed Junk Foods!

    Below are five ridiculous movie-themed junk foods that I’ve collected over the years. They were pulled from storage bins that I wish were airtight, but definitely aren’t. Hostess Snoballimus and Chocwave Cakes! Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) I still rate these as the weirdest sn

  • Dino Drac’s April Funpack is here!

    Ohhh, man. Gonna be honest, I can’t get a feel for how this month’s Funpack looks on paper, but I can promise you that it’s one of my ultimate favorites in all of the years that I’ve been doing this. When you get these babies in the mail, your socks will be rocked. AVAILABLE FOR

  • Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 32!

    I admit that I’ve been slacking on the regular Dino Drac content lately. Would you believe that I’ve gotten really into playing horseshoes? I mean, I haven’t, but I feel like it’s an excuse you’d accept. Picture me out there, wiping dirt on my jeans after every bad toss. Isn’t

  • Purple Stuff: Wrestlers Gone Hollywood!

    Guys, I’m nervous. For the first time since 1994, I’m going to WrestleMania. So many conflicting emotions! It’s sure to be a great show and there’s no way I wanna miss a potential Becky win on the grandest stage of ‘em all, but… 80000 people? In broad daylight?! Eeeek. As has b

  • Dino Drac’s March Funpack is here!

    In keeping with my recent tradition of posting Funpack info way too late into the month, Dino Drac’s March Funpack is FINALLY here! If you want in, you only have a short time to order… and I think you’ll want to, because this one is loaded. THREE DAYS ONLY! ACT FAST! U.S. ONLY! You k

  • Purple Stuff: More TV Theme Songs!

    Three years ago, we released a Purple Stuff episode all about TV theme songs, with favorites ranging from Amen to Growing Pains. Obviously, we couldn’t name all of our favorite themes in a single episode, so we’re finally back for Round 2: This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit cel

  • 5 Awesome Vintage Cereal Box Prizes!

    A little over ten years ago, I started collecting old cereal prizes. It was the right time to do it. Even the most humdrum old prize is good for a few bucks these days, but nobody was really paying attention to ‘em back then. I’d win auctions for ten bucks and walk away with piles

  • Remember when Raphael saw Critters? Well…

    One of my favorite moments from the 1990 Ninja Turtles movie is when Raphael blows off steam with a trip to the movie theater: “Where do they come up with this stuff?!” I was always surprised by Raph’s nonplussed reaction to Critters. It seemed like the perfect movie to see late at

  • Geek Magazines in the 1990s!

    From Wizard to Starlog to Hero Illustrated, I grew up surrounded by geek magazines. They were so important to me, but not for the obvious reasons. If you were a lonely kid in pre-internet times, those magazines felt like travel brochures to some alternate universe where you and your bullsh

  • Dino Drac’s February Funpack is here!

    I’m kicking myself for not getting the February Funpack on the site earlier than this, because man, it’s a good one. Oh well. That just means you’ll need to be EXTRA FAST if you want in. (Please be extra fast.) AVAILABLE IN THE UNITED STATES ONLY! Dino Drac’s February Funpack is he

  • Purple Stuff Podcast: The RED Show!

    At right around this time last year, we published our Purple Stuff GREEN SHOW — that being a tribute to 10 great green things. It was intended to kick off a series of color-themed shows, so here we are with #2! This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit unleash our RED SHOW. We’

  • 5 Awesome Marshmallows from Cereal History!

    Hey guys. I’d like to tell you about some of my all-time favorite cereal marshmallows. It’s one of the few subjects that I’m extremely passionate about it. Really, the only other one is that weird couch the Romans used to eat on. Pizza-Shaped Marshmallows! TMNT Cereal (1991) I love h

  • Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 31!

    Here’s another batch of TV commercials from the ‘80s and ‘90s, as I continue to muscle through these dangerously teetering piles of VHS tapes that are all over my desk. (Not kidding. Whenever I scratch my shoulder, there are at least three crashes.) McDonald’s “Gold Rush&

  • Purple Stuff Podcast: ALIENS!

    I’ve been into space aliens for as long as I can remember. Whenever Unsolved Mysteries did a UFO segment, I led their cheering section. Whenever a flying saucer turned up on the cover of Weekly World News, I’d buy the issue. Aliens are one of my forever-jams. Jay from The Sexy Armpit i

  • Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 30!

    Last week, I took a chance on a very large lot of homebrew VHS tapes, and my God, it really paid off. I’ve been at this for 20 years, and this was probably my best-ever score. I’m now sitting on more ancient TV commercials than I could ever hope to write about, which I suppose

  • Purple Stuff Podcast: New Old Stuff!

    It’s a new year for the Purple Stuff Podcast, so we’re gonna celebrate with a show about new things. New old things, I mean. This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit tackle all sorts of new old stuff. From New Coke to Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning, so long as

  • Dino Drac’s January Funpack is here!

    Cure your post-holiday blues with Dino Drac’s first Funpack of the new year! AVAILABLE FOR THREE DAYS ONLY! UNITED STATES ONLY! You know the drill by now! Funpack subscriptions are $25 a month (including shipping), and for as long as you remain subscribed, you’ll keep getting new b

  • Old Junk Food in Old Movies, Volume 2!

    Earlier this week, I kicked off a new series on Dino Drac: Old Junk Food in Old Movies. Now even the worst movies are worth watching, because who knows, maybe I’ll spot a can of discontinued Pringles hiding in the background. You can read the first volume over here, but if you ask me, th

  • Old Junk Food in ’80s and ’90s Movies!

    Whenever I watch old movies, I keep an eye out for old junk food. Sometimes I spot it during a kitchen scene. Other times it’s while characters zip around supermarkets. Whatever the case, spotting old junk food makes me lose track of the movies’ actual plots as I bittersweetly contempl