Dinosaur Dracula!

30 Haikus About Groceries.

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GROCERY SHOPPING!
Here are thirty dumb haikus
About what I saw. (more…)

The Coffee Cup Exhibition: Part 2!

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Uh oh — the coffee cups are back!

If you recall, I asked Dino Drac readers to submit photos of their weirdest coffee cups, owing to morbid curiosity and probably worse. That was back in July. Over a hundred of you accepted the challenge, and I was so overwhelmed the sheer volume of strange mugs that it took me more than half a year to start building the gallery.

In February, we looked at 25 crazy mugs sent in by Dino Drac’s thirstiest readers. Today, we’ll bring that number up to 50. In Part 2 of The Coffee Cup Exhibition, enjoy another 25 mugs, belonging to complete strangers from across the globe.

For this article, I am merely the curator. The photos and stories pasted below come from the individual cup owners. I think you’ll enjoy seeing the cups, but I think you’ll enjoy learning why they mean so much to their owners even more. It’s a kind of voyeurism. Like a dumb version of Rear Window.

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#26 – Counselor Deanna Troi the Coffee Cup!
Submitted by Nina S.

“Though born into a Star Wars family, my cultish devotion to the animated series Gargoyles allowed me to cultivate an appreciation for the actors of Star Trek: TNG, many of whom voiced characters in the Disney cartoon.

“It’s been a difficult few months for me, so I decided to book an appointment with my therapist to do some mental housekeeping. ‘I have no idea where this came from, but I figured you’d appreciate it,’ she told me, as she brought me freshly brewed green tea in this marvelous flagon.

“That is why she’s a great therapist.” (more…)

The Coffee Cup Exhibition: Part 1!

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Back in July, I asked everyone to send in photos of their weirdest coffee mugs for an upcoming Dino Drac feature. A whole lotta you did. In fact, I was so daunted by the number of submissions that I shelved the idea for months. During that time, I expertly handled any emailed inquires by pretending I didn’t get them.

Tonight, I’m finally gonna make good on the promise. Partially, at least. There are way too many entries for me to tackle all at once, so consider this Part 1 of Dino Drac’s Coffee Cup Exhibition, featuring 25 of YOUR very strange mugs.

Of course, some of you may be wondering why I’m doing this at all

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Our story starts with the nWo Wolfpac mug seen above. I drink from it constantly, but I have no idea where it came from. While neither a treasured possession nor something I’d even notice were it to go missing, that dumb cup has quietly become such a comfortable part of my life.

There are many others like it. We have our “standard” coffee cups, sure, but I always find myself reaching for the ones that are loud and obnoxious. The ones that remind me of gift shops from old vacation spots. The ones that were given to me by business owners who no longer own businesses. The ones with Papa Smurf on them.

I suspected that your relationships with coffee cups were similar, and looking over the submissions only proves it. Holy hell, you guys have some AMAZING mugs! Weird mugs, happy mugs, depressing mugs! Mugs rife with nostalgia, mugs plastered with failed product logos! I love them all, and I think the rest of you will, too.

Below are the first 25 coffee cups, complete with notes from the readers who submitted ’em. Get ready for everything from Star Trek to seahorses! (more…)

Happy Mother’s Day!

Guys, we need to talk about this Mother’s Day card.

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I made it for my mother in 1986. 1987 at the absolute latest. Considering the card’s enormous size and use of strange paper, I can only assume it was an art project from grade school.

The cover looks innocent enough, or at least as innocent as a cover featuring a shark swimming through blood could look. It’s what inside that troubles me. It’s very curious that both my teacher and mother saw this card and never thought, “hmmm the boy needs help.”

Who knows, maybe they did. (more…)

Make your own Virtual Christmas Tree!

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This holiday season is going way too fast. Before you know it, it’ll be big boring depressing January. Don’t waste what little time we have left! Do things! Do stupid things that are only okay to do at this time of year!

I’m here to help. Tonight I’m gonna teach you how to make your own Virtual Christmas Tree. Above all else, it will be an excuse to mess with crayons and glue.

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Step 1: Gather the materials!

Most importantly, you’ll need this image. Print it. That’s your paper tree. You’re going to make magic out of that paper tree.

You’ll also need crayons, scissors, glue, and access to a color printer. It occurs to me that nearly 40% of the things I do require the exact same set of materials. (more…)

Thanksgiving is fantastic.

Well, Thanksgiving kicked off with huge news.

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I’m sitting there watching a giant Kool-Aid Man roll by, and what does Matt Lauer announce?

THE PENDING RETURN OF SHARKLEBERRY FIN.

Oh my GOD. YESSSS!

I’ll have more to say about this fantastic news later. This post is just meant to be my generalized “hey Happy Thanksgiving” message.

So hey.

Happy Thanksgiving!

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I’m thankful for all of you. I cannot mean that more sincerely. At some point over the past six months, this site turned the corner for me. A while back, it’d evolved into something I did mainly because it was something I always did. Well, NOT NO MORE.

I’d been chasing a “remembered feeling” with this for so many years. It’s not something I often mention or could even properly describe, but I’ve managed to find that feeling again. I truly love the time I spend doing this, and I can’t thank you enough for making it worthwhile.

I’ll save the heavier sap for my Christmas post, but yeah, y’all are awesome. I’ve come to feel that my success isn’t in the volume of my audience, but the quality of the people within it.

To celebrate, I recreated Charlie Brown’s Thanksgiving. Many of you will remember the first time I did this, over ten years ago. It really deserved to be a yearly tradition, and brother, you gotta start somewhere. (more…)