Dinosaur Dracula!
Dinosaur Dracula

The Mostly-Complete Dino Drac Archives.

You have some reading to do!

Below are most of the Dino Drac blog archives. Certain categories may be excluded to keep things tidier. If you notice any typos, pretend you didn’t.

  • Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 33!

    I’ve been doing some spring cleaning, because that’s technically still possible in June. I badly need to free up space, so as much as I’ll miss that Jenga game with half of the bricks missing, it’s all for the greater good. In the process, I dug up more piles of homebrew VHS tapes,

  • Stranger Things invades Baskin-Robbins!

    I’m so glad that I finally hopped on the Stranger Things bandwagon. Not only is it a great show, but it would’ve killed me to skip all of this wackadoo promo shit for its third season. First was that New Coke hoopla, and now the series has completely taken over Baskin-Robbins! It’s

  • Godzilla Burgers at Johnny Rockets!

    I’m leaving to catch Godzilla: King of the Monsters in about, oh, two hours. I have no idea if I can finish this review before showtime, but I’m gonna try, because these half-baked paragraphs about weird cheeseburgers are surprisingly time-sensitive. Yes, Godzilla has invaded Johnny Ro

  • The Purple Stuff Podcast discovers NEW COKE!

    If you didn’t hear the big news, Coca-Cola is dusting off NEW COKE as part of a special partnership with Stranger Things. (The show’s third season is set in 1985, smack in the middle of New Coke’s shaky debut.) This past Thursday, thousands of us struggled to place orders on New Coke

  • Purple Stuff Podcast: 10 Wonderful Witches!

    Make some tea, hit the lights and pray for a thunderstorm, because the latest episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast is gonna put you in a Halloween mood. This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit pay tribute to ten of our favorite pop culture WITCHES. We’re tackling movies like The Craft,

  • Dino Drac’s May Funpack has arrived!

    Whew! I don’t like to peel the curtain back with these Funpacks, but suffice it so say, some come together easier than others. This month’s had plenty of last minute tricks in store for me, leading to scrambles and hair-pullings and, what’s that word, agita? I like that word. But all

  • 5 Old Soda Cans, Explored.

    I wouldn’t necessarily call myself a collector of old soda cans, even though I’ve accumulated over a hundred of them. I prefer to think of myself as an extreme dabbler. That sounds like something a guy who badly cuts his own hair would be, at least. Below: Five of my favorite soda cans

  • More Humdrum Highlights from the Summer of ’93!

    Last June, I showed you some of the highlights from my 1993 diary, mostly written during summer vacation between the 8th and 9th grades. Let’s do that again! As a refresher, I was at that point as awkward and isolated as I hope I’ll ever be. I hated the loneliness, yet only felt comfor

  • Vincent Price’s Supper Casserole!

    This was a good day. The weather was nice, I won a cheap eBay auction, and oh yeah, I made VINCENT PRICE’S SUPPER CASSEROLE. Back in 1977, Vincent Price shared this wonderfully weird recipe on behalf of Creamettes Macaroni. Price never shied away from paid endorsements, but since he was

  • Five Random Action Figures, Part 45!

    I haven’t published a new edition of Five Random Action Figures since last June, because the remaining bits of my collection are stuffed into storage bins so extremely buried that I’d have to tear this whole place apart to get at ‘em. Luckily, life threw me a bone: As part of our pre

  • 5 Ridiculous Movie-Themed Junk Foods!

    Below are five ridiculous movie-themed junk foods that I’ve collected over the years. They were pulled from storage bins that I wish were airtight, but definitely aren’t. Hostess Snoballimus and Chocwave Cakes! Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) I still rate these as the weirdest sn

  • Dino Drac’s April Funpack is here!

    Ohhh, man. Gonna be honest, I can’t get a feel for how this month’s Funpack looks on paper, but I can promise you that it’s one of my ultimate favorites in all of the years that I’ve been doing this. When you get these babies in the mail, your socks will be rocked. AVAILABLE FOR

  • Five Retro TV Commercials, Part 32!

    I admit that I’ve been slacking on the regular Dino Drac content lately. Would you believe that I’ve gotten really into playing horseshoes? I mean, I haven’t, but I feel like it’s an excuse you’d accept. Picture me out there, wiping dirt on my jeans after every bad toss. Isn’t

  • Purple Stuff: Wrestlers Gone Hollywood!

    Guys, I’m nervous. For the first time since 1994, I’m going to WrestleMania. So many conflicting emotions! It’s sure to be a great show and there’s no way I wanna miss a potential Becky win on the grandest stage of ‘em all, but… 80000 people? In broad daylight?! Eeeek. As has b

  • Dino Drac’s March Funpack is here!

    In keeping with my recent tradition of posting Funpack info way too late into the month, Dino Drac’s March Funpack is FINALLY here! If you want in, you only have a short time to order… and I think you’ll want to, because this one is loaded. THREE DAYS ONLY! ACT FAST! U.S. ONLY! You k

  • Purple Stuff: More TV Theme Songs!

    Three years ago, we released a Purple Stuff episode all about TV theme songs, with favorites ranging from Amen to Growing Pains. Obviously, we couldn’t name all of our favorite themes in a single episode, so we’re finally back for Round 2: This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit cel

  • 5 Awesome Vintage Cereal Box Prizes!

    A little over ten years ago, I started collecting old cereal prizes. It was the right time to do it. Even the most humdrum old prize is good for a few bucks these days, but nobody was really paying attention to ‘em back then. I’d win auctions for ten bucks and walk away with piles

  • Remember when Raphael saw Critters? Well…

    One of my favorite moments from the 1990 Ninja Turtles movie is when Raphael blows off steam with a trip to the movie theater: “Where do they come up with this stuff?!” I was always surprised by Raph’s nonplussed reaction to Critters. It seemed like the perfect movie to see late at

  • Geek Magazines in the 1990s!

    From Wizard to Starlog to Hero Illustrated, I grew up surrounded by geek magazines. They were so important to me, but not for the obvious reasons. If you were a lonely kid in pre-internet times, those magazines felt like travel brochures to some alternate universe where you and your bullsh

  • Dino Drac’s February Funpack is here!

    I’m kicking myself for not getting the February Funpack on the site earlier than this, because man, it’s a good one. Oh well. That just means you’ll need to be EXTRA FAST if you want in. (Please be extra fast.) AVAILABLE IN THE UNITED STATES ONLY! Dino Drac’s February Funpack is he