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Dinosaur Dracula

The Mostly-Complete Dino Drac Archives.

You have some reading to do!

Below are most of the Dino Drac blog archives. Certain categories may be excluded to keep things tidier. If you notice any typos, pretend you didn’t.

  • Conceptions of Obsessions. (Don’t worry, it’s about Ninja Turtles.)

    I can’t recall how most of my obsessions started. “They just did,” I guess. I’d slowly latch onto things, and by the time passing interests became fixations, the beginnings were already foggy. For a few of my obsessions, though, I remember the exact moments of birth. (“Conception

  • Nabisco’s Suddenly S’mores, from 1990!

    Let’s talk about Nabisco’s Suddenly S’mores. The magically microwaveable cookies arrived in 1989, but didn’t go national until 1990. That’s when I tried them. I was eleven years old, and junk food was the only thing that loved me back.  Suddenly S’mores arrived with fanfare.

  • Classic Christmas Commercials, Volume 15!

    I’m not sure if there’s much point in writing about old Christmas commercials the day before Christmas Eve, when 95% of the people who’d be interested are too busy to look. Oh well. If you’re in the remaining 5%, this one’s for you!  A Christmas Story on WPIX! (1990) Even befo

  • Purple Stuff Podcast: Christmas Songs, Part 5!

    The Purple Stuff Podcast’s holiday tradition continues! (Hopefully just in time for us to accompany you on a weekend full of last-minute holiday errands!) Get set for another batch of AWESOME CHRISTMAS TUNES. This is the fifth volume in the series, so now we’re really starting to dig d

  • Dino Drac’s December Funpack is here!

    Dino Drac’s December Funpack is here, and it’s full of holiday cheer! (Sorry, I was definitely someone who wrote lame catalog descriptions in a past life.) LIMITED SUPPLY! UNITED STATES ONLY! Consider the December 2019 Funpack a gift to yourself. I assembled this one with Christmas

  • Ancient Holiday Appetizers, Part 7!

    For the seventh consecutive year, here’s a new edition of Ancient Holiday Appetizers. Let’s make some weird food, dudes! If you’ve been with this series from the start, you know that I usually pull recipes from old cookbooks. This year, I thought I’d try something different. Y’al

  • Classic Christmas Commercials, Volume 14!

    I know that the last edition of Classic Christmas Commercials was published just a few days ago, but inspiration hits where it hits. I’m back on my bullshit. For what it’s worth, there are some serious heavy hitters in this batch. Everything from a rapping Santa Claus to a soup-eating

  • 2019’s Hottest Holiday Junk Food, Part 1!

    If past Decembers are any indication, it’ll be Christmas in eight minutes. This month goes way too fast, so make sure you’re grabbing at any and every opportunity to do festive things. Even if those “festive things” only amount to eating limited edition candy bars. Here’s the

  • Classic Christmas Commercials, Volume 13!

    I’m writing this on Thanksgiving Eve, so apologies if I seem a little distracted. Based on the Sharpie notes scrawled on my arm, today I gotta shop for 80 mushrooms, stuff 80 mushrooms, wash three loads of clothes, pick up relatives from the airport, shave for the first time in weeks and

  • The 1990 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade!

    We’re less than a week away from Thanksgiving. It’s one of my favorite days of the year, full of food, family and a weird ass parade where people ooh and aah at big-eyed kaiju balloons. Me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit wanted to continue our tradition of reviewing ancient Macy’s Parad

  • Pringles Friendsgiving Feast!

    For the second year in a row, Pringles released a stupid awesome Thanksgiving kit as an online exclusive. Get a load of their ridiculous Friendsgiving Feast: The kit features six different crisps, including all of the flavors necessary to create a turducken “stack.” (Hence the monstrou

  • Dino Drac’s November Funpack is here!

    Oh hi! Time to debut Dino Drac’s November Funpack! I’m happy (or is that sad) to report that subscriptions are finally back open for this one, albeit with limited spots. If you dig what you see, scroll to the bottom for ordering info! UNITED STATES ONLY! LIMITED SUPPLY! The holidays ar

  • 1970s Golden Grahams Holiday Party Mix!

    There I was, on our weird couch, lazily paging through the December 1978 issue of Family Circle. (Shut up. It’s how I decompress.) I love those old holiday magazines. Many are technically before my time, but not really, because my mother kept a stack of them in our old kitchen cabinets.

  • Montgomery Ward 1985 Christmas Toy Catalog!

    It’s that time of year again, when I spend a fortune on old toy catalogs just to tear out the pages, all for your benefit. Let’s look at some of the highlights from Montgomery Ward’s 1985 Christmas catalog! I didn’t grow up near any Montgomery Ward stores, but their catalogs were b

  • Purple Stuff: 10 Awesome Xmas Commercials!

    We’re kicking off the Purple Stuff Podcast’s 2019 holiday season with one of our most-requested episodes: CHRISTMAS COMMERCIALS. It’s one of my favorite subjects! This week, me and Jay from The Sexy Armpit celebrate 10 of our favorite Christmassy TV ads, covering everything from the

  • McDonald’s 40th Anniversary Happy Meal!

    Y’all know the scoop by now. To celebrate the Happy Meal’s 40th anniversary, McDonald’s just released A TON of old school Happy Meal toys. I mean a legit ton. Check out their promo vid: People like me had been on McDonald’s case for years, wondering why they weren’t tapping i

  • Grandma Arbuckle’s Sweet Potatoes!

    In Garfield’s Thanksgiving, Grandma saves Jon’s disastrous date with Liz by covertly preparing Thanksgiving dinner. It’s the best part of the TV special, which should go without saying since Grandma Arbuckle is the best part of anything in which she participates. While Jon entertains

  • Happy Halloween!

    Happy Halloween, everyone! (What’s left of it, anyway.) I hope you’ve had a great season, and I hope Dinosaur Dracula’s 2019 Halloween Countdown made it a little more special. Here’s a quick video that basically says the same, but also features a giant demon rabbit:  WATCH IN SC

  • Five Random Action Figures, Part 46!

    We’re now stuck in a weird situation where Halloween feels like it’s already happened, but clearly hasn’t. Pretty much everyone I know did their big celebrating over the weekend, and now we’re kind of puttering toward the finish line. Hey, whatever. We’ve all done plenty these pa

  • 2019’s Best Halloween Junk Food, Part 3!

    I suppose there isn’t much value in spooky junk food reviews this late into the season, but whatever, I’m doing this one just for me. I mean, the idea of a whole Halloween Countdown slipping by without any coverage of Ghoul-Aid Popping Candy? Shit makes me sick. Sooo, here’s the thir